The night was ablaze with color, the shops along the street flickering with colorful lights.
Like a birthday celebration prepared just for Wen Qing.
The north gate of Qingcheng No. 1 High School.
The moment she walked out of the school gate, Wen Qing skipped over to Zhou Shixu's side.
Because of the cake fight after school that afternoon, none of them had eaten dinner.
As they walked along, Zhou Shixu's footsteps suddenly changed direction.
He turned into a wonton shop.
Not forgetting to tug at the zipper of Wen Qing's backpack, altering her forward stride.
It was nearly ten o'clock, and most of the shops had already turned off their lights. Apart from the wonton shop, only barbecue stalls were still open.
As they approached the door, the billowing steam already warmed their cheeks.
The temperature inside contrasted with the cold outside, and the moment Zhou Shixu stepped in, his lenses began to fog up.
He owned many styles of glasses, and Wen Qing could never figure out his pattern for which pair he wore each day.
While waiting for their order, Wen Qing poked the table with her finger, slowly drawing circles.
She wondered if Zhou Shixu really hadn't prepared a birthday present for her.
Even though she hadn't given him one for his last birthday either.
Zhou Shixu was about ten months older than her.
When he turned eighteen, the two of them were still in the not-speaking-to-each-other stage.
Plus, the Zhou family didn't pay much attention to these things.
She didn't even know whether he had celebrated his eighteenth birthday.
At the thought of Zhou Shixu spending the day he came of age all alone in the villa, Wen Qing's heart began to ache with bitterness.
Somehow, the birthday present suddenly didn't seem so important anymore.
Many students had come out for a late-night meal, and their wontons still hadn't arrived after a long while.
Wen Qing suddenly lifted her eyes to look at Zhou Shixu.
The fog on his lenses hadn't cleared yet, and he had casually set his glasses aside.
The moment she raised her eyes, she realized he was looking down at her too.
"Zhou Shixu."
"Hm?"
"It's about your birthday last year."
She didn't need to finish the sentence—Zhou Shixu already understood what she wanted to ask.
"You want to ask whether anyone celebrated my birthday with me, during the time I was ignoring you?"
Wen Qing nodded.
"Do you think there could've been anyone besides you?"
She shook her head again.
After a moment, seizing the pause when the wontons arrived at the table, Wen Qing defended herself once more:
"I wasn't ignoring you."
"Then you forgot about the time?"
"How could I."
I did think about finding you.
But why should I?
Why shouldn't you be the one to come make up with me first?
Before Wen Qing could figure out how to phrase it, Zhou Shixu rinsed a spoon and handed it to her.
He spoke in a flat tone:
"It's fine."
Wen Qing almost reflexively wanted to ask how it could possibly be fine.
"It wasn't an important day."
If anyone else had said it wasn't an important day, Wen Qing could clearly tell whether they were being resentful.
But Zhou Shixu's tone was too flat.
She couldn't tell whether it was resentment and grievance, or simply indifference.
"It was a very important day. I was wrong."
Zhou Shixu's movements froze.
Wen Qing rarely admitted fault. She had always been someone who walked one road all the way to the dark end since childhood—to put it nicely, she was stubborn; to put it bluntly, she refused to change until death.
Apart from mistakes she herself considered matters of principle, she almost never apologized to anyone.
"You weren't."
"I was."
The steam rising from the wontons warmed Wen Qing's cheeks, stinging her eyes until they ached and burned.
"You can't be at fault."
Words that would sound sarcastic from anyone else's mouth sounded all the more resolute coming from Zhou Shixu's.
"Everyone can be at fault. You can't just say I'm not at fault right now. You can only say you'll let me make it up to you. Otherwise I can't get past it."
"Fine. Make it up to me."
The moment the words left his mouth, Zhou Shixu's hand was already open, held out in front of Wen Qing.
"Then what compensation do you want? There's a birthday present too—I'll give it to you tomorrow."
"A handshake to make peace?"
Looking at Zhou Shixu's open palm facing upward, Wen Qing frowned slightly. Who made peace like this?
Tentatively, she placed her fingertips in his palm.
The instant they touched, Zhou Shixu curled his fingers, drawing all her fingertips into his palm.
Then he opened his hand again, rotating his palm, hooking the back of her hand from her little finger.
Release.
Grip tight.
Release again.
Grip tight again.
After several rounds, he finally let go completely.
Wen Qing's entire palm retained his warmth.
She looked away and spooned wontons into her mouth.
Still a little scalding.
Before her heartbeat could settle, Zhou Shixu spoke, echoing her earlier words:
"It was my fault for not coming to find you first."
But Wen Qing's answer was different from his.
She spoke as if it were only natural:
"Yes, it was your fault."
Not coming to make up was your fault first. Even if she was at fault, it was only a little.
The fault of not celebrating his birthday.
The fault of not spending New Year with him.
The fault of suddenly turning cold.
Nothing beyond that.
"So now it's my turn to give compensation?"
Watching him unzip the inner pocket of his backpack, Wen Qing forgot to eat the wonton she had just scooped up.
Besides the birthday present.
She couldn't imagine what else Zhou Shixu could produce.
An ordinary envelope was placed on the table.
A kraft paper envelope, the kind the post office commonly used.
Nothing remarkable about it at all.
Wen Qing picked it up and opened it.
There were quite a few pages inside.
At least four or five.
First line of the first page:
August 23, 2018. Overcast.
School started. Saw her. Didn't speak.
September 1, 2018. Overcast.
Opening ceremony. Fifth column from the south. Made new friends.
October 1, 2018. Overcast.
Auntie told me to come for dinner. She didn't come home. Went out with new friends.
December 31, 2018. Overcast.
Little New Year.
January 4, 2019. Overcast.
New Year's Eve dinner. First time alone.
March 10, 2019. Overcast.
Presents. So many on the table. She couldn't tell them apart.
July 23, 2019. Overcast.
Summer break. Family told me to go back to City A. Didn't go. In case she came looking for me.
August 25, 2019. Overcast.
She didn't come. A whole year without a word to me.
September 20, 2019. Overcast.
Rainy day. Umbrella. How to move forward.
November 27, 2019. Overcast.
New friends again.
November 28, 2019. Overcast.
Starting to hate it.
November 29, 2019. Overcast.
How to hate.
…
August 23, 2020. Overcast.
Talk to me. Please.
Wen Qing only skimmed a few years before folding the pages and stuffing them back into the envelope.
Why had he given her these?
"Two years."
Wen Qing clutched the envelope tightly in her palm as she heard his next words:
"Every moment I regretted."
Regretting why I didn't come to you sooner.
Regretting why I didn't say it sooner.
Regretting why I had to sulk.
Regretting that I knew perfectly well that if I took just one step, you would walk countless steps toward me.
But I always had to test you.
I always wanted to know—after we separated, would you come find me on your own?
I wanted to use the cold war to prove how important I was to you.
How ridiculous.
Wen Qing tucked the envelope safely into her bag.
How could she not remember the time of every meeting and every chance they might have reconciled?
Two cowards.
Always waiting.
Waiting for someone to toss a pebble in front of them, only daring to run toward each other at the moment they might get hit.
Fortunately, the pebble finally came.
And how could anyone sort out who was right and who was wrong anyway?
"Annoying pest."
Even though it was Wen Qing's complaining words, the corners of Zhou Shixu's mouth couldn't help but lift.
Rather than an expression of disgust, those three words sounded more like a safe word signaling that their relationship was about to be mended.
In the past, every time Zhou Shixu made Wen Qing angry.
Hearing those three words meant she had forgiven him.
It was just that a certain tsundere couldn't bring herself to say "let's make up."
"Mm, I am."
The shop was warm, and the wontons in front of them had only gone lukewarm, not yet completely cold.
Just right for this moment.
The wontons had barely entered his mouth when Zhou Shixu asked her, "Did you burn yourself just now?"
She hadn't before, but the moment his words came out, Wen Qing nearly bit her own tongue.
She stuck out the tip of her tongue and fanned at it gently with her hand.
"You didn't ask then, you ask now—even if I got burned, it stopped hurting ages ago."
"My fault."
"Annoying pest."
"When will I stop being an annoying pest?"
"Depends on my mood."
By the time they left the wonton shop, it was very, very late.
Half the streetlights along the road had gone out.
On the side without streetlights, even the stars seemed brighter.
"Zhou Shixu."
"Hm?"
"Do you even remember what important day today is?"
"Your birthday."
He said those three words and then said nothing more.
Wen Qing stared at him without blinking even once.
Where's the present?
Where's my great big birthday present?
But Zhou Shixu remained completely unresponsive.
The two of them kept walking along the roadside.
The plane trees by the road had already sprouted new buds.
There were no more fallen leaves at their feet.
The long winter was finally almost over.
Since no present was forthcoming, Wen Qing didn't mind asking for one herself.
As they turned a corner, their fingers brushed lightly.
She imitated Zhou Shixu's earlier gesture, hooking his fingertip and giving it a gentle shake.
His steps stopped instantly.
Zhou Shixu looked at her in disbelief.
Wen Qing finally, for once, detected a trace of surprise in those unfathomably calm eyes—and beyond that, an emotion she couldn't identify flowing out of Zhou Shixu's gaze, burning into her.
"You just shook hands with me to make peace, so now I'm shaking hands with you to make peace."
Even with her heart pounding against her chest, Wen Qing spoke in a matter-of-fact tone.
"Okay."
"I was really angry that you never came to make up with me, so the handshake has to last longer."
Zhou Shixu drew back his hand, and their hooked fingertips came apart.
Before Wen Qing could come to her senses, he took her outstretched finger into his palm.
"Mm, longer."
So long that even as they approached the entrance of the residential compound, he still wouldn't let go.
Because they were wearing school uniforms, and because their posture looked so much like holding hands.
The compound's gatekeeper couldn't help glancing at them several times.
Wen Qing had a bad feeling about what was about to happen.
Aside from students, the fastest spreaders of gossip were idle people.
Not idle in terms of work—idle at heart.
The moment she spotted the old gatekeeper from a distance, she abruptly tried to pull her hand back.
But she tugged twice and it wouldn't budge.
Wen Qing felt her finger was about to cramp when Zhou Shixu finally released her hand, pinching her fingertip and rubbing it gently.
Only after the bedroom bed had endured countless rolls from Wen Qing did she pat her cheeks to make herself come back to her senses.
The flush on her face still wouldn't fade.
She unzipped her schoolbag to take out the envelope, but as she did, a deep purple gift box fell out of the bag.
The brand logo sat right in the center of the box.
The moment she saw it, Wen Qing's heart, which had just calmed down, trembled faintly again.
It wasn't just because the brand was expensive.
More importantly, it was a well-known diamond ring brand.
After lifting the lid of the gift box, she took out another box inside.
The moment she twisted open the small lock, Wen Qing felt a touch of disappointment.
A chain appeared before her.
A bracelet, or a necklace.
At this age, the chance of receiving a ring was practically zero.
Wen Qing hooked the chain off the black lining.
It was long—so it must be a necklace.
The moment she raised her fingertips, the end of the necklace came into view before her eyes.
A ring.
Encircled by a ring of small diamonds.
It could easily be removed from the chain.
As if they were never meant to go together in the first place.
Wen Qing instinctively placed the ring at the tip of her ring finger and gently pushed it on.
It fit perfectly.