The hot water was wonderfully warm.
The doctor had adjusted the temperature perfectly. It was slightly on the hotter side, enough to soothe chilled muscles and sink into tired bones but nowhere near hot enough to burn.
Wrapped in that comforting warmth, You Li found himself fully immersed in the bathtub.
His private hospital room was luxurious enough to include a large bathtub yet ever since losing the use of his legs, he had never dared soak in it alone.
The buoyancy of water frightened him.
If he slipped, if he lost his balance, if he couldn’t pull himself back out,
He might drown there without anyone knowing.
Now, with the doctor there to help him, he could finally relax inside the tub without fear.
Gradually, the tension that had gripped his nerves for an entire night began to loosen.
The cold that had seeped into his body from curling up on the floor until dawn slowly faded beneath the embrace of the warm water.
The doctor remained standing quietly near the bathroom doorway.
He simply watched as You Li used a towel to wash himself.
It was obvious he was staying nearby only to ensure nothing happened.
Even when helping him into the bathtub earlier, the doctor had maintained impeccable boundaries, careful not to overstep the limits of ordinary social interaction.
Perhaps because of the doctor’s presence, perhaps because the water was so comfortable, You Li gradually became drowsy.
His eyelids began fighting a losing battle.
Sleepiness crept over him little by little.
Soon, he was barely able to keep his eyes open.
The reason he had refused to come out from under the bed earlier was simple.
Deep down, he still felt that the thing that had held him all night hadn’t left.
The call bell he had pressed had never brought anyone.
No one had come.
No one had saved him.
You Li no longer trusted the nurses who had tried to coax him out.
But the doctor was different.
When he had experienced hallucinations in the bathroom before, it was the doctor who had guided him back out.
Like a pitiful little creature that had been hurt once and learned its lesson, he had spent a full three minutes struggling before finally daring to reach out and place his hand in the doctor’s.
After being helped out from beneath the bed, a sense of security had emerged almost instinctively.
A fragile trust.
If the doctor wasn’t nearby, You Li suspected he wouldn’t have been able to sleep at all.
He still wasn’t sure whether that person had truly gone away.
Only the doctor’s presence made him feel even slightly safe.
Inside the bathtub, the frail young man eventually drifted off to sleep.
The comfortable water.
The quiet environment.
The exhaustion that had accumulated throughout the night.
Together, they pulled him under.
His head tilted to one side.
His cheek rested against the edge of the bathtub.
Even in sleep, faint traces of dried tears remained around his eyes.
Part of his chin sank beneath the rippling water.
The surface rose and fell gently around him.
Even asleep, he seemed uneasy.
A slight frown lingered at the tip of his nose.
The doctor stepped forward.
Then slowly crouched beside the bathtub.
He watched him silently.
You Li was still very young.
His features had not yet completely matured.
Yet under the shifting reflections of the water, those youthful features seemed to possess an almost startling beauty.
Soft.
Dreamlike.
Blurred around the edges.
His pale complexion only heightened that fragile impression.
The doctor leaned down.
Then carefully lifted him from the bathtub.
Water immediately soaked through most of his white coat.
He didn’t seem to care.
The first thing he did was wrap You Li securely in a large bath towel.
Only after ensuring he was covered did he carry him toward the sink counter.
He set him down gently.
Then carefully checked him.
Only after confirming everything had been thoroughly cleaned did he begin wiping away the remaining droplets of water from the young man’s skin.
You Li seemed utterly exhausted.
Despite being moved around and dried off, he never truly woke up.
At most, he opened his eyes briefly.
Only a little.
Just enough to glance around vaguely.
Then he relaxed again and slipped back into sleep.
Perhaps he was dreaming.
He felt as though someone was speaking near his ear.
A nightmare.
Because the voice sounded exactly like the one from the previous night.
The same voice that had whispered beside him in the darkness.
His arms and legs seemed to rise and fall without his control.
It felt as though the doctor was dressing him.
Slowly.
Unhurriedly.
Methodically.
Then fragments of conversation drifted into his dream.
“Have I not already told you to know your limits?”
“Why is he always so attached to you?”
“You should leave.”
A pause.
Then another voice.
“What? Are you feeling sorry for him?”
“Haven’t you always been generous?”
“No matter whose side he’s on.”
Another pause.
“How many died last night?”
“One.”
“There are four left.”
“They got away.”
“Baby was waiting for me the whole time.”
“I had to go see him first.”
“Come back after you’re finished.”
A click of the tongue.
“Fine.”
“Then let me carry him back to bed.”
After that, You Li felt himself being tucked into warm blankets.
Something soft landed on his face.
A kiss.
Then the presence departed.
The lingering coldness that accompanied that closeness made him uneasy.
His eyes opened abruptly.
For a moment, he stared blankly ahead.
The room was quiet.
The only person present was the doctor.
He sat beside the bed, watching him.
A considerable amount of time appeared to have passed.
The doctor was currently bandaging his injured fingers.
Four fingers had already been wrapped.
The injuries themselves weren’t serious.
Just minor abrasions.
The sort of wounds that probably would have healed on their own after a night’s sleep.
You Li instinctively tried to withdraw his hand.
The doctor immediately caught it.
“Behave.”
The moment he heard those words, You Li nearly had a stress reaction.
The phrase had become terrifying.
Instantly, he stopped moving.
He sat quietly and allowed the doctor to continue.
The doctor glanced at him.
“The other hand.”
You Li obediently extended it.
His palm opened flat.
His fingertips were delicate and pale.
It wasn’t surprising that they had been scraped open so easily.
All ten fingers were eventually treated with ointment and antiseptic.
Each one was carefully wrapped in gauze.
When the doctor finally finished, You Li softly said,
“Thank you, Doctor.”
The doctor moved the tray from the bedside table.
On it sat a bowl of cereal mixed with dried fruit and soaked in sweet, hot milk.
Unlike yesterday’s rushed powdered milk, today’s smelled fresh.
Rich.
Naturally sweet.
The doctor picked up a spoon.
“Open your mouth.”
You Li looked down at his heavily bandaged fingers.
A refusal rose to his lips.
Then disappeared.
Instead, he opened his mouth obediently.
The atmosphere between them was unusually peaceful.
Quiet.
Comfortable.
One spoonful followed another.
Warm milk.
Soft cereal.
Sweet dried fruit.
The doctor’s feeding pace was neither too fast nor too slow.
Perfectly measured.
Watching him, You Li suddenly felt something strange.
Did attending physicians really have this much time?
This much patience?
This much energy to care for a patient personally?
For some reason, it felt less like a doctor caring for a patient and more like a private caretaker looking after someone full time.
The thought felt oddly strange.
Very strange.
But he was too hungry to dwell on it.
Before he realized it, he had finished the entire bowl.
The cereal was filling.
Warmth spread through his body beneath the blankets.
The doctor asked,
“Are you full?”
“Is there anything else you’d like to eat?”
You Li was easy to satisfy.
He shook his head.
“Thank you, Doctor.”
The doctor didn’t press him.
“If you want something, tell me.”
He set the empty bowl aside.
“Do you want to sleep?”
You Li hesitated.
Then nodded.
Then shook his head.
The doctor understood immediately.
He wanted to sleep.
The drowsiness simply hadn’t fully returned yet.
“Then let’s have a bedtime conversation.”
The doctor looked at him.
“Can you tell me what happened last night?”
You Li met his gaze.
Then remembered Fāng Zhì.
The man who had suddenly been discharged by his family yesterday.
After a long silence, he blinked once.
Quietly.
Then shook his head.
The refusal was unmistakable.
He didn’t want to talk.
He didn’t want to confide in the doctor anymore.
His fingers tightened nervously around the edge of the blanket.
He was afraid the doctor would become angry.
The doctor remained calm.
“Then sleep.”
His hand gently covered the young man’s eyes.
His voice was warm.
Comforting.
“I’ll stay until you fall asleep.”
Guilt immediately stirred inside You Li.
He felt guilty for doubting the doctor.
For feeling wary of him.
For no longer trusting him completely.
But in the end, he said nothing.
Instead, he obediently closed his eyes beneath the doctor’s hand.
The meal had made him sleepy.
Very quickly, exhaustion surged back.
Not long afterward, steady breathing filled the room.
You Li had fallen asleep.
The doctor waited until he was completely asleep.
Then he checked his wristwatch.
Without making a sound, he rose from his chair.
He left the room.
His footsteps were slightly hurried.
As though he had already spent far longer here than he should have.
Before leaving, he instructed the nurses not to allow anyone to disturb Room Thirteen.
You Li slept until late afternoon.
By the time he woke, the sky outside had already begun turning gold.
The sun was sinking toward the horizon.
For a long time, he simply lay in bed, staring blankly ahead.
Only when sunset drew near did he finally force himself to move.
Slowly, he transferred himself from the bed into his wheelchair.
He didn’t want to remain inside the room after dark.
Not anymore.
After washing up, You Li quietly wheeled himself out into the corridor.
A confused look lingered on his face.
In truth, he had no idea where he was going.
He had nowhere to go.
The room assigned to him no longer felt like his own.
Something unknown seemed to have taken possession of it.
And there was no one he could think of who was safe enough to shelter him.
You Li fell silent for a moment.
“…The clown,” he finally answered.
After thinking about it, he seemed to feel that the codename alone was not enough.
“The imaginary enemy the doctor told us to create together.”
“The doctor said this is our dream but it isn’t. The clown is the true owner of the dream, isn’t he?”
The System automatically ignored the foolish conclusion that followed.
“So you finally believe me?” it asked.
It sounded as though some of the restrictions placed upon it had finally loosened, allowing it to continue.
“It wasn’t a hallucination?”
The inside of the wardrobe was cramped and dark.
You Li curled himself into a small ball, hugging his knees tightly. His face rested against them, his voice quiet and slightly muffled.
“I don’t know.”
He hesitated before continuing.
“At first, I thought it was.”
“Everything that happened after I entered this hospital felt unreal.”
His eyelashes lowered.
“The doctor told me I was mentally ill. The nurses told me I was mentally ill. Everyone here treats me like a psychiatric patient.”
“I keep seeing things other people can’t see. Hearing things other people can’t hear.”
“I thought all of it was caused by my illness.”
The System remained silent.
You Li continued speaking softly.
“But hallucinations shouldn’t be able to hurt people.”
His fingertips unconsciously curled.
The memory of last night made his body tremble slightly.
“The wheelchair moved by itself.”
“The door closed by itself.”
“The call bell never brought anyone.”
“He dragged me.”
His voice grew increasingly uncertain.
“He talked to me.”
“He…”
You Li stopped.
He couldn’t continue.
The memories were too frightening.
Too humiliating.
Too strange.
His chest tightened involuntarily.
The System asked coldly,
“So now you know it wasn’t a hallucination?”
You Li lowered his eyes.
“I don’t know.”
The answer almost made the System laugh in anger.
“You still don’t know?”
You Li buried his face deeper between his knees.
“Because none of it makes sense.”
“Nothing makes sense.”
“The doctor doesn’t make sense.”
“The hospital doesn’t make sense.”
“The players don’t make sense.”
“You don’t make sense either.”
The System was silent.
You Li continued.
“If this really is a game dungeon, then why do I not remember entering it?”
“Why don’t I have a player interface?”
“Why can’t I see the things everyone else can see?”
“Why does everyone seem to know something that I don’t?”
The wardrobe fell quiet.
Only their breathing remained.
After a long pause, the System finally spoke.
“Because you’re special.”
You Li blinked.
“What kind of answer is that?”
The System sneered.
“The truthful kind.”
You Li immediately felt that it was being perfunctory again.
“You always say things like that.”
“Then tell me directly.”
“Who am I?”
The System went silent.
A long silence.
So long that You Li almost thought it had been muted again.
Finally, it spoke.
“I can’t.”
“Why?”
“Because if I tell you now, you’ll die.”
You Li froze.
The answer sounded absurd.
Yet for some reason, the System’s tone carried a seriousness he had never heard before.
He quietly asked,
“Then who are you?”
The System replied immediately.
“Your System.”
You Li frowned.
“That doesn’t explain anything.”
The System laughed coldly.
“You ask too many questions.”
You Li was about to continue speaking when he suddenly heard something outside.
A sound.
Very faint.
Very soft.
It sounded like footsteps.
The footsteps seemed to come from the corridor.
Both You Li and the System fell silent simultaneously.
The narrow wardrobe instantly became deathly quiet.
You Li’s breathing unconsciously slowed.
The footsteps continued.
Tap.
Tap.
Tap.
Unhurried.
Measured.
Almost leisurely.
As if someone were wandering through the corridor.
Or searching for something.
You Li’s fingers instinctively tightened around his sleeves.
His heart began pounding.
The footsteps drew closer.
Closer and closer.
The sound stopped outside the room.
You Li’s entire body stiffened.
He stared through the thin crack of the wardrobe door.
The fluorescent light from outside spilled into the darkness through that narrow gap.
The room itself remained empty.
No one could be seen.
Yet the footsteps had clearly stopped.
Right outside.
A long moment passed.
Nothing happened.
You Li slowly let out a breath.
Then, the bedroom door opened.
Creak.
The sound was incredibly soft.
Someone had entered.
You Li’s pupils shrank.
Through the narrow crack, he could see only a small portion of the room.
No figure appeared.
No shadow appeared.
Nothing.
The room looked completely empty.
Yet You Li knew.
Someone had entered.
The footsteps resumed.
Slowly.
Steadily.
Moving through the room.
Tap.
Tap.
Tap.
Every step felt as though it landed directly upon his nerves.
You Li instinctively held his breath.
The footsteps wandered around the room for a while.
Then stopped.
Right in front of the wardrobe.
The world suddenly became silent.
So silent that You Li could hear his own heartbeat.
Thump.
Thump.
Thump.
His heart pounded wildly against his chest.
The System’s voice appeared inside his mind.
Very cold.
Very quiet.
“Don’t make a sound.”
You Li didn’t dare.
Not even a little.
He didn’t know how much time passed.
Maybe a few seconds.
Maybe several minutes.
Then, through the narrow crack of the wardrobe, he saw something.
A white corner of fabric.
A white coat.
Doctor’s clothing.
You Li’s breath caught instantly.
The doctor?
Why was the doctor here?
But before he could think further, another thought surfaced.
No.
Not necessarily the doctor.
That thing wore a white coat too.
The clown.
The surgeon’s knife.
The smiling mask.
The cold eyes.
You Li’s entire body began trembling uncontrollably.
Outside the wardrobe, complete silence continued.
No movement.
No footsteps.
No breathing.
As though the person standing there had become a statue.
Watching.
Waiting.
Observing.
You Li suddenly felt an overwhelming sensation.
The feeling that someone was staring directly at him.
Even through the wardrobe door.
Even through the darkness.
The gaze seemed to pierce straight through the wooden panels and land upon his body.
His scalp went numb.
The System suddenly spoke.
Its voice carried an unprecedented seriousness.
“Don’t open the door.”
“Whatever happens.”
“Don’t open it.”
You Li’s fingers curled tightly.
Then, a knock sounded against the wardrobe door.
Knock.
Knock.
Knock.
Three gentle taps.
Polite.
Patient.
Almost courteous.
A man’s familiar voice followed.
“You Li.”
The moment he heard it, You Li’s eyes widened.
The doctor’s voice.
It was unmistakably the doctor’s voice.
Warm.
Gentle.
The same voice that had fed him breakfast.
The same voice that had bandaged his fingers.
The same voice that had told him to sleep.
“You Li.”
The voice sounded again.
“I know you’re in there.”
“Come out.”
The System immediately laughed coldly.
“Don’t believe him.”
Outside, the voice remained calm and patient.
“You haven’t eaten dinner yet.”
“You’ll get hungry.”
You Li bit his lip.
His body trembled slightly.
The voice continued.
“Come out.”
“You’ll be safe with me.”
The System’s tone became colder than ever.
“If you open that door.”
“You’ll regret it.”
You Li sat motionless in the darkness.
One voice outside.
One voice inside his head.
Neither willing to back down.
The narrow wardrobe seemed to become a battlefield between the two.
Meanwhile, You Li sat in the center of it all.
Not knowing whom he should trust.
Not knowing who was lying.
Not knowing who wanted to save him.
And not knowing who wanted to drag him into the darkness forever.
After a moment of hesitation, You Li nodded.
“It wasn’t a hallucination.”
His voice sounded especially soft and obedient within the cramped, enclosed darkness.
“I believe you.”
The System fell silent again.
You Li still wanted to keep talking to it.
He was afraid.
After hiding inside the narrow, airless wardrobe for so long, his breathing had gradually begun to grow uneven. To stop his psychosomatic symptoms from flaring up, he could only keep distracting himself.
But before he could say another word, his body reacted faster than his thoughts.
A fine tremor ran through him.
Then he heard it.
The sound of the room door opening.
The footsteps that followed were unhurried.
Deliberate.
As though the newcomer was intentionally applying pressure, making sure every step carried an unmistakable sense of presence.
A moment later came a low whistle.
Light.
Casual.
Yet overflowing with threat.
The System suddenly spoke inside his mind.
“Have you ever seen someone keep a dog?”
You Li didn’t dare answer.
He buried his face even deeper against his knees and struggled to breathe quietly.
In the darkness, he gave the smallest shake of his head.
No.
He hadn’t.
Then,
A deafening crash exploded through the room.
The entire wardrobe shook violently.
You Li nearly cried out.
The sound of wood being pierced rang beside his ear, followed by the brutal scrape of something sharp tearing downward through the cabinet wall.
Wood splintered.
Fragments cracked apart.
At the same time, an icy voice rang out.
“Get out.”
A long slash had been carved through the wardrobe.
The blade had cut straight through the wood, leaving behind a jagged opening.
Light from outside immediately poured into the darkness.
The moment the shadows retreated and the person outside saw who was hiding within, all movement abruptly stopped.
You Li lowered his head, avoiding the gaze descending from above.
His breathing came fast and shallow.
The System continued speaking calmly.
“Some owners are incredibly irresponsible.”
“They abandon their dogs before they’ve even raised them properly.”
“They forget to take off the collar.”
“They don’t even bother untying the leash.”
The figure outside slowly crouched down.
He stared fixedly at You Li, who was curled up tightly in the corner of the wardrobe, trembling with fear.
The narrow space was already cramped yet the man seemed intent on squeezing his entire body inside as well.
For a long time, he simply looked at him.
Then a low chuckle escaped his lips.
“So you’re hiding from me?”
The System continued.
“It stays chained up.”
“It starves.”
“It loses all reason.”
“Eventually, it’ll drool over even raw meat.”
“To deal with a mad dog like that…”
“The first step is to throw it a bone.”
After saying that, the System offered absolutely no explanation of how You Li was supposed to throw the bone.
His vision had already blurred from tears.
Everything looked hazy.
He pressed his lips together tightly.
It took him a long time to gather enough courage to speak.
This should have been the first time he had ever done something like this.
Even his voice trembled awkwardly with unfamiliarity.
Yet when the words left his mouth, they carried an inexplicable sense of natural familiarity.
As though some instinct buried deep inside him already knew how to say them.
“…I…”
“I’m hungry.”
His eyelashes trembled.
He lowered his gaze even further.
“I want something to eat.”
His voice grew softer.
Barely audible.
“Touch…”
“Touch my stomach.”
The words came out haltingly.
Embarrassed.
Uneven.
Almost as if he was learning them for the first time.
Then he lifted his head just enough to reveal eyes damp with fear.
Eyes that seemed to carry a pleading softness no one could easily refuse.
“Can you find me something to eat?”
“Please?”
✦ ✧ ✦
Nycreth
[Translator]
☕ A LITTLE SOMETHING FOR THE TRANSLATOR
The translator would like to formally submit a coffee request.
☕ BUY THEM A COFFEE →
✧ (づ｡•ㅅ•｡)づ ☕ ✧
✦ thank you for reading ✦
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ChaptersChapter 1 · I have amnesia (1)Chapter 2 · I have amnesia (2)Chapter 3 · I have amnesia (3)Chapter 4 · I have amnesia (4)Chapter 5 · I have amnesia (5)Chapter 6 · I have amnesia (6)Chapter 7 · I have amnesia (7)Chapter 8 · I have amnesia (8)Chapter 9 · I have amnesia (9)Chapter 10 · I have amnesia (10)Chapter 11 · I have amnesia (11)Chapter 12 · I have amnesia (12)Chapter 13 · I have amnesia (14)Chapter 14 · I have amnesia (14)Chapter 15 · I have amnesia (15)Chapter 16 · I have amnesia (16)Chapter 17 · I have amnesia (17)Chapter 18 · I have amnesia (18)Chapter 19 · I have amnesia (19)Chapter 20 · I have amnesia (20)Chapter 21 · I have amnesia (21)Chapter 22 · I have amnesia (22)Chapter 23 · I have amnesia (23)Chapter 24 · I have amnesia (24)Chapter 25 · I have amnesia (25)Chapter 26 · I have amnesia (26)Chapter 27 · I have amnesia (27)Chapter 28 · I have amnesia (28)Chapter 29 · Desert Highway (1)Chapter 30 · Desert Highway (2)Chapter 31 · Desert Highway (3)Chapter 32 · Desert Highway (4)Chapter 33 · Desert Highway (5)Chapter 34 · Desert Highway (6)Chapter 35 · Desert Highway (7)Chapter 36 · Desert Highway (8)Chapter 37 · Desert Highway (9)Chapter 38 · Desert Highway (10)Chapter 39 · Desert Highway (11)Chapter 40 · Desert Highway (12)Chapter 41 · Desert Highway (13)Chapter 42 · Desert Highway (14)Chapter 43 · Desert Highway (15)