“We won… by a narrow margin…”
It was late at night.
Lying in bed, I gazed up at the ceiling, surrendering myself to the pleasant exhaustion that washed over my body.
A cool sensation brushed against my sweat-dampened skin.
“Ahhh… Phew… ♡”
Sayako-san was fast asleep, her head resting against my chest. Her expression was one of complete and utter bliss.
Her long, disheveled hair looked incredibly alluring, and the countless extra arms she’d sprouted earlier had disappeared.
Even a presumed vengeful goddess needs her beauty sleep.
“God, she’s so sexy and cute… I want to hug and kiss her all the time. But if I do that, Round Eight will begin…”
I reluctantly held myself back.
As I enjoyed the comforting softness of her embrace, I closed my eyes once more.
Her breasts were wonderfully soft and resilient, so much so that even the fanciest pillow in the world couldn’t hope to compete.
And their size?
Well, let’s just say there was absolutely nothing to complain about.
This is it…
The best bed in the world.
With Sayako-san in my arms, I drifted back to sleep.
…
Ever since I was a child, I’d been able to see beings from another world.
Naturally, I started thinking about how to make a living from that ability fairly early on.
And thus, the idea of becoming a fraudulent fortune teller was born.
You see, spirits are often much more honest than living people. They have all sorts of information, and if you know how to communicate with them, you can learn things that would otherwise be impossible to discover.
Since I couldn’t do much with my ability beyond seeing and sensing them, I figured I might as well put it to practical use.
Of course, I made plenty of mistakes along the way.
I was a mischievous little brat, and my curiosity frequently got the better of me. But after a few unpleasant experiences, I gradually learned how to live like an ordinary person.
One important lesson was that most spirits seemed to follow a particular rule.
They generally couldn’t interfere with you unless they knew you were aware of their presence.
That applied to former humans, animals, monsters, and all sorts of other supernatural beings.
It was why they often resorted to strange noises, unsettling presences, and inexplicable phenomena to attract people’s attention.
But if you pretended not to notice them?
Most of the time, they eventually gave up.
Ordinary spirits simply didn’t have much power to begin with.
And so, after graduating from a respectable university in the Kansai region, I left home and started a fortune-telling business in a corner of this city.
My business strategy was simple.
Find clients who are being haunted by spirits I can communicate with, then use those spirits to solve their problems.
I’d pretend to read palms, gaze into crystal balls, or examine prayer beads while buying myself enough time to gather information.
Then I’d offer advice based on what the spirits told me.
It was a sham, of course.
But it worked.
Before long, I’d earned a reputation as a handsome fortune teller whose predictions were almost always correct.
…Although, since I’d been wearing a fox mask from the very beginning, I’ve never understood how anyone decided I was handsome.
Perhaps it was because I’m tall.
At any rate, business went well enough that I eventually moved into a proper establishment.
That was how I came to rent the Kisaragi Building and open Kibagami-do.
The location was excellent, but the property itself had a rather horrifying history.
It was notorious for a string of accidents and strange incidents, which was precisely why the landlord was willing to rent it to me for a ridiculously low price.
Fifty thousand yen a month.
Not bad, right?
The spirits inhabiting the building were surprisingly reasonable, too. After a few incidents and some negotiations, the place eventually became completely peaceful.
Actually, it became so peaceful that you could practically call it a spirit-free zone.
Naturally, I haven’t told the landlord about any of this.
There’s no way I’m giving up my fifty-thousand-yen rent.
Not while I’m alive, anyway.
And that brings us to the beginning of this whole story, three years ago.
Because my very first customer at Kibagami-do was none other than…
Sayako-san.
When I first saw her, I nearly threw up.
At the time, I was still a young man who’d recently opened his business. My first customer claimed to be a university student from a neighboring prefecture.
But the moment he walked through the door, I knew something was terribly wrong.
His entire body was shrouded in a dark, murky mist. Only a small portion of his face was visible.
I’d encountered all sorts of supernatural beings over the years, but I’d never seen anything like him.
I couldn’t even tell what he was.
Whatever it was, it certainly wasn’t an ordinary spirit.
I desperately pretended not to notice and listened as he complained about his recent misfortunes.
Nothing had been going right for him lately. He’d been having terrible luck, and he couldn’t understand why.
It was a familiar kind of consultation.
And, in a way, fortune-telling was really just another form of counseling.
That was how I dealt with clients whose problems couldn’t be solved through supernatural trickery alone.
You didn’t necessarily need to give someone a definitive answer. Sometimes, all they wanted was a person who would listen to them seriously.
If you could understand what was bothering them and gently guide the conversation in a direction that helped them think things through, that was often enough.
So I listened carefully, offered a few words of advice, and sent the man on his way.
He left looking considerably happier than when he’d arrived.
And then…
He left that dark, murky mist behind at Kibagami-do.
Wonderful.
Just wonderful.
I spent the rest of the day pretending nothing was wrong while inwardly wondering how I was supposed to deal with the thing.
Since I couldn’t exorcise spirits, there wasn’t much I could do.
My only defense was to ignore it and hope it eventually grew bored and left.
With that in mind, I went to bed.
That night, I woke up with sleep paralysis.
And sitting on top of me was a tall woman with long black hair, dressed in tattered clothing.
“…What?”
For a moment, I couldn’t process what I was seeing.
“What’s going on…? What’s happening?!”
The woman tilted her head.
The moment our eyes met, she seemed delighted.
Then she leaned toward me, muttering something I couldn’t quite understand.
They noticed me…
They noticed me.
It was immediately obvious that she wasn’t an ordinary spirit.
But when I finally understood what was happening, the words that escaped my trembling lips weren’t a scream of terror.
They weren’t a desperate plea for my life, either.
Nor were they words of rejection.
Instead, I blurted out,
“Y-You’re unbelievably sexy! Marry me!”
I took a breath.
“If marriage is too soon, then please go out with me with marriage in mind! It was love at first sight!”
…Yes.
I know.
It was an absolutely ridiculous thing to say in that situation.
But hear me out.
She was exactly my type!
Her skin was as white as freshly fallen snow.
Her long black hair glistened as though it were perpetually wet.
Her lips were red as blood.
And she stood well over two meters tall, with a voluptuous figure that made my heart race.
Despite her ragged clothing, her waist was beautifully slender, creating a striking contrast with her generous curves.
She was practically the embodiment of my ideal woman.
To be perfectly honest, Genichiro Kibagami has always had a weakness for busty women.
And Sayako-san?
She was a masterpiece.
“Grrr…!”
Suddenly, something tightened around my throat.
The woman was strangling me.
Her eyes glowed through the gaps in her tangled hair as she glared down at me.
There were three of them.
Two resembled ordinary human eyes, while the third sat in the middle of her forehead.
It was a strange, inverted eye, its black and white colors reversed.
All three were filled with a hatred so deep that it made my blood run cold.
“Liar.”
Her voice was quiet.
But the hatred behind that single word was overwhelming.
Tears of blood welled up in her eyes and streamed down her pale cheeks, splattering across my face.
Then she opened her mouth.
Sharp, pointed canine teeth emerged from between her lips.
She leaned closer, looking as though she intended to bite my face off.
And then, suddenly, she stopped.
“…Real?”
Her voice was barely audible.
Blood still streaming from her eyes, she shifted her weight slightly, as though trying to confirm something.
Then she glanced downward.
Ah.
I see.
Given the position she was sitting in, she’d noticed something rather obvious.
Something that was currently having a very enthusiastic reaction to the situation.
Yes.
My body was responding exactly as you’d expect from a young man who’d just encountered his ideal woman at point-blank range.
“Real…?”
The blood tears began to subside.
A faint blush spread across her cheeks, mixing with the red streaks on her face.
She stared at me, apparently bewildered.
I answered with every ounce of conviction I could muster.
“Listen to me! There’s no way I’d get this worked up if I were lying!”
I swallowed nervously.
“I’m serious! You’re exactly my type, and I really do want to marry you! But if I’ve offended you, I’m sorry! If you don’t like me, you’re free to leave!”
I paused.
“Or, if you feel that sorry for me, you can just kill me!”
…Well, that last part might have been a little excessive.
But I meant every word.
Ever since I’d gotten a proper look at her, I hadn’t felt even the slightest bit afraid.
Honestly, if she’d shown up looking like that while I was still awake, I probably would have tried to woo her anyway.
The woman seemed completely at a loss.
She released my throat, brought her hands to her cheeks, and swayed from side to side in embarrassment.
After a while, she picked up a rag and began wiping the blood from my face.
It was a surprisingly gentle gesture.
Unfortunately, her already tattered clothing shifted as she leaned over me, revealing even more of her figure.
My heart nearly stopped.
…This woman was dangerous.
Dangerously beautiful.
And the effect she was having on me was becoming increasingly difficult to ignore.
…
By the time she finished wiping my face, my body had become considerably more enthusiastic than it had been even during my high school years.
“Ah…!”
She seemed to realize what was happening.
For a moment, she froze.
Then she glanced at me several times, as though she couldn’t quite believe what she was seeing.
A faint smile appeared on her face.
She began swaying her hips from side to side.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa! Please stop moving like that! I’m begging you!”
I was barely holding myself together.
“I’m going to lose my mind! Please, have mercy!”
Unfortunately, I wasn’t in a condition to think clearly.
I’d spent the entire day moving into Kibagami-do, cleaning the building, negotiating with its resident spirits, and dealing with my very first customer.
I was exhausted.
And after all that work, I’d been planning to visit a hostess club the following evening to celebrate the successful opening of my business.
That had been the plan.
Then this ridiculously attractive supernatural woman had appeared out of nowhere and climbed right on top of me.
Imagine a barrel full of gunpowder with a burning torch hovering directly above it.
I won’t describe the details, but the situation was becoming increasingly explosive.
The woman watched my increasingly desperate reaction.
Then, at last, she smiled.
Not the frightening, blood-soaked expression she’d worn when she first appeared.
A genuine smile.
One filled with happiness.
She leaned closer, gently stroked my chest, and pressed her lips against mine.
Her long, snake-like tongue slipped between my lips before brushing against my ear.
Then she whispered softly,
“You’re such a pervert… ♡”
“Is that your way of introducing yourself?!”
I stared at her in disbelief.
“Can I take that as a yes?! Does this mean we’re dating?!”
“Kyaa… ♡”
Her reaction was all the answer I needed.
And at that very moment, despite possessing absolutely no psychic abilities, I somehow managed to break free from my sleep paralysis.
I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her close.
Well…
You can probably guess what happened next.
Let’s just say we spent the rest of that night getting to know each other very, very well.
…
Starting the following day, Sayako-san began living at Kibagami-do.
Apparently, she’d been pleased by my confession and everything that followed.
Before long, she had settled into the role of my live-in partner, looking after me and helping around the establishment.
There was just one curious detail about her.
Ordinary spirits generally couldn’t interact physically with the living.
But Sayako-san could touch me, kiss me, and even pin me down without the slightest difficulty.
What’s more, she was clearly visible to people who possessed no psychic abilities whatsoever.
That led me to a rather obvious conclusion.
Sayako-san was something far greater than an ordinary ghost.
Perhaps a vengeful spirit.
Perhaps a curse goddess.
Or perhaps something that existed on an entirely different level from the beings I was accustomed to seeing.
Whatever she was, her power was extraordinary.
Human spirits, no matter how strong their emotions, generally couldn’t interfere with the living to that extent.
But Sayako-san could.
And honestly?
I had absolutely no complaints.
She seemed to like me, and I considered myself incredibly fortunate to have found such a wonderful partner.
I had nothing but gratitude toward whatever god had arranged our meeting.
As far as I was concerned, it didn’t matter whether she was a ghost, a monster, or an evil god.
If she could be seen and touched, and if she wanted to stay with me, then why should I complain?
Besides, I wasn’t an exorcist.
I couldn’t exorcise her even if I wanted to.
And I had absolutely no desire to try.
The sensible option was obvious.
If a terrifying supernatural being wants to live with you, make friends with her!
Preferably, become her boyfriend.
And, if you’re particularly fortunate, her husband.
There was just one small problem.
Sayako-san didn’t remember who she was.
I knew she wasn’t human, but I had no idea whether she’d originally been a person, how long she’d existed, or what she’d been before becoming the being I knew.
She seemed to have wandered through the world for a very long time, existing in a vague, almost dreamlike state.
Occasionally, she appeared to recall fragments of a distant past.
Something about cursing people.
Something about killing someone.
But the memories were hazy, and she couldn’t explain them clearly.
Personally, I wasn’t particularly interested in digging into her past.
The law doesn’t exactly have a straightforward procedure for dealing with vengeful spirits, anyway.
Still, there was one issue we needed to resolve.
She needed a name.
After considering several possibilities, we eventually settled on Sayako-san.
The moment she heard it, she repeated the name softly, almost as though she were tasting the sound.
“Ah… Sayako… Kibagami… ♡”
She looked so happy that I nearly melted on the spot.
Naturally, I hugged her.
And, well…
Let’s just say that business closed early that day, too.
We decided to treat that day as our provisional wedding anniversary.
Since we couldn’t legally register a marriage, we became husband and wife in our own way.
A common-law marriage between a completely ordinary man and a supernatural woman of questionable origins.
Romantic, isn’t it?
…
As time passed, Sayako-san began helping me with my work.
Whenever a client came in with a spirit I could communicate with, I handled the consultation as usual.
But when something dangerous appeared, something malicious, something that couldn’t be reasoned with, Sayako-san took care of it.
Quietly.
Efficiently.
And, in many cases, rather thoroughly.
She would simply consume the hostile spirit or the accumulated malice surrounding it.
Apparently, evil spirits and negative emotions were delicious snacks to her.
She could eat ordinary food, too, but she found these supernatural meals particularly satisfying.
As long as she was happy, I had no objections.
There was, however, one small complication.
After consuming a particularly nasty spirit, Sayako-san would become unusually affectionate.
Very unusually affectionate.
And by affectionate, I mean she’d practically pounce on me the moment we were alone.
It wasn’t that I minded.
Far from it.
Sayako-san was exactly my type, and I was more than happy to return her affection.
But if a client happened to have an appointment waiting outside, things could become rather inconvenient.
Her enthusiasm could be overwhelming.
Fortunately, I was hardly lacking in enthusiasm myself.
With Sayako-san, my stamina seemed to increase to ridiculous levels.
Of course, the aftermath could leave me thoroughly exhausted.
Still, a man has to make sacrifices for love.
And so, three years passed.
Our relationship remained as affectionate as ever.
I hoped it would continue that way until the day I finally died of old age.
Naturally, I’d have to make sure she never grew tired of me.
After all, the thought of being abandoned by my beloved wife was far more frightening than any ghost I’d ever encountered.
…
“Hmm… Hm?”
I slowly opened my eyes.
It seemed I’d been dreaming about the past.
Sayako-san was no longer beside me, and the pleasant aroma of miso soup drifted in from the kitchen.
A presumed vengeful goddess was making breakfast for me.
Somehow, that had become part of my everyday life.
“Boss… Good morning.”
Perhaps she’d noticed I was awake, because Sayako-san soon appeared with breakfast.
For some reason, she always called me “Boss” or “President” while we were working at Kibagami-do.
We weren’t exactly running a corporation, but I suppose the title sounded nice.
In private, however, she sometimes called me by my name.
And, honestly, hearing her say “Genichiro” in that sweet voice of hers was almost unfairly adorable.
Wait a minute.
“Hey! Are you trying to kill me first thing in the morning?!”
I stared at her in disbelief.
She was wearing a naked apron.
A naked apron.
And not just any apron, either.
It was one I’d made during a home economics class back in elementary school.
It was so small that it barely covered anything at all.
An outfit that would never, ever be allowed on daytime television.
“Please… eat me… ♡”
“Guhhhhhhh!”
I clutched my chest.
I had two appointments scheduled for the morning.
Two!
I couldn’t possibly cancel them just because my wife had decided to launch a surprise attack on my self-control.
“It’s impossible… I’m doomed…!”
I could practically feel imaginary tears of blood streaming down my face, just as they’d streamed down Sayako-san’s when we first met.
Still, there was no denying one thing.
No matter how dangerous the supernatural world became, no matter how many curses, evil spirits, or terrifying gods appeared on our doorstep…
Life at Kibagami-do was peaceful as ever.
Well…
At least until my wife decided otherwise.