"Hey, just calm Park Sion down and clean up the mess."
"What, do you think Park Sion's a kid who needs soothing?"
"Can’t you see his eyes have completely flipped?"
"……"
"I don’t know what kind of drama you two are filming, but stop poking around everywhere. Nothing good’s gonna come of it for you."
There wasn’t even a hint of humor in his voice. Shin Jaeyoung lightly gripped my shoulder and brought his lips to my ear.
"Remember when I told you to be more wary of arrogance than stupidity? Forget it. Cancel that. Don’t be wary of anything. Just keep doing what you’re doing."
"What are you talking about?"
"Don’t let a dumbass like Kim Youngjin sway you. Just believe in Park Sion."
Shin Jaeyoung stepped back, arms crossed, giving me a sideways look.
"You’re good at that, aren’t you?"
He raked his eyes over me with mockery. The surge of humiliation hit me like a punch. All those vague, cryptic lines Shin Jaeyoung had tossed at me before—weren’t they all warning me not to trust Park Sion? Now here he was, switching sides, demanding I put my trust in him. What the hell is going on?
My head felt like it was going to explode. Jaeyoung’s inconsistent attitude, Youngjin’s sudden change, and the unfamiliar face of Park Sion—all of it tangled into one mess, throwing me into chaos. While I was trying to quietly organize my thoughts, Shin Jaeyoung came closer. He mussed my hair and said,
"Aigoo, Yoon Seonwoo. There you go overthinking again. I told you not to."
"Get your hand off."
"Hey, Park Sion’s coming. This time, seriously, just—"
Before he could finish whispering, Park Sion grabbed my arm and yanked me away from him. I felt Park Sion’s chest against my back.
"Oh, fuck off! Don’t look at me like that, seriously. It’s so fucking over the top."
Jaeyoung raised both hands toward Park Sion, then tousled his own hair like this was too ridiculous to deal with.
"I’ve done enough. I’m out. You two deal with your shit yourselves."
With that, Jaeyoung quickly disappeared from sight. Behind me, Park Sion was still holding my shoulder. I twisted my torso to try and pull away. His hand slipped off my shoulder but lightly caught my hand instead.
"Let go."
"Yoon Seonwoo."
"Let’s go home separately today."
Park Sion gripped my hand more tightly without a word. A dull ache flared in my wrist and I twisted it.
"That hurts. Let go."
"Why were you hugging Kim Youngjin?"
"I wasn’t hugging him."
"Then what were you doing?"
His cold eyes bore down on me.
It had looked like a misunderstanding, but I didn’t like the way Park Sion was acting. That gaze—like I was some cheating lover he was interrogating—made me feel sick. But I had to get him to let go first, so I opened my mouth like I was offering an excuse.
"It wasn’t a hug. Youngjin was trying to teach me some self-defense."
"Self-defense?"
His cold stare sharpened instantly.
"I think he heard something from Kim Shinju. It wasn’t anything else, he was just worried—"
"Fuck… that piece of shit Youngjin…"
"Hey! Park Sion!"
"Are you naïve, or just stupid?"
"What?"
"You believed that?"
He looked at me like he was trying to hold back his fury, exhaling sharply. His eyes raked over me coldly. It was the same gaze Shin Jaeyoung had used on me before.
"Why are you talking to me like this?"
"What, should I be all gentle with someone who lied to me and ran off to some other guy?"
His voice dropped low, eyes flashing menacingly. I had lied, so I had no excuse. But I didn’t have to accept being looked down on. I didn’t avoid his eyes as I replied.
"I’m sorry I lied. That was my fault. But if I’d told you the truth, you wouldn’t have let me go to Youngjin."
"Exactly. So why’d you go to that bastard? Even lying to me to do it."
Park Sion gripped my shoulder so tightly it left nail marks. His throat trembled as he tried to swallow down his rage.
"Because he’s been acting weird."
"I told you to ignore him."
"How the hell am I supposed to ignore someone who’s been sulking like a ghost for a whole week?"
"Then why the fuck do you even care if that asshole’s sulking?!"
His voice rang through the empty hallway like an explosion. The familiar wave of fear and tension hit me. The back of my neck stiffened. I forced the words out of my mouth.
"…Because he’s our friend."
"What?"
"Youngjin is our friend."
"Hah. Don’t make me laugh."
That blatant scoff scraped across my cheek. The disgust I’d been ignoring wrapped around my whole body like a snake. Park Sion was crushing me with his gaze alone.
Why are you looking at me like that? Of all people, why you?
"Let go."
"……"
"I said it hurts!"
A wave of emotion surged up. I couldn’t take his domineering attitude anymore. I tried to wrench myself free from the hand that was clutching my shoulder so hard it hurt. Park Sion shoved me into the wall.
"Who the fuck said he was your friend?"
"The fuck you mean who? Me! I fucking said so!"
"You? That bullshit’s all in your head."
"Watch your mouth."
"If I ever see you with Youngjin again—just try me."
"And what are you gonna do if you do?!"
I smacked his hand off my arm and pushed him away. He staggered slightly, then stepped toward me again, breathing hard. Jaeyoung was right—Park Sion had totally lost it. There’s no other way to explain this madness. His eyes gleamed cold and wild. I slapped his arm away and grabbed him by the collar.
"Park Sion. Don’t cross the line."
"What? Line?"
"No matter how much I like you, that doesn’t mean you get to control who I hang out with."
"……"
"Who I spend time with is up to me."
His lips trembled in anger. His pitch-black pupils quivered—was it shock, or pure rage?
This was going to go too far. I slowed my breathing and loosened my grip. Anger, fear, and frustration all tangled together inside me. I had to get away from him. But just as I tried to step back, he grabbed me again. I kept my voice calm and took his hand gently.
"I’m going home alone today. Call me when you’ve cooled off."
"Fuck, Yoon Seonwoo!"
"What, you trying to pick a fight with me now? If not, let go!"
His grip finally loosened. I took a deep breath and looked at him.
"Let’s talk again when we’ve both calmed down."
"……"
"I’m sorry I lied. I mean it. But you were wrong too, today."
Park Sion bit his lip so hard he nearly drew blood. The blaze in his eyes had dulled to ashes. Then his gaze dropped to the floor. He barely kept himself from reaching out to me again. I turned my back on him and walked away, leaving him behind. The aftertaste of it all was bitter.
***
God said to Abraham:
"Abraham. Offer your beloved son Isaac as a burnt sacrifice. Give him to me."
Abraham agonized. He couldn’t understand why God would demand something so terrible. Was it a trick of the devil? Was the vivid voice of God he heard just an auditory hallucination?
But in the end, Abraham decided to obey. He took Isaac’s hand and climbed the mountain. Every step of that path was filled with human torment. Between religious faith and moral duty, between love for God and love for his son, didn’t he despair at every moment?
On the mountaintop, Abraham built an altar and bound his beloved son. Just as he raised the knife to slit Isaac’s throat, angels descended from the heavens and stopped him. In that way, he proved his unwavering faith in God—and was granted salvation.
After coming home from school, I sat blankly on the sofa, thinking about Abraham and his choice.
If Abraham’s story had ended in tragedy, what would people have said about him? Wouldn’t he have gone down as a fanatic blinded by religion, a heartless father?
In the end, the line between faith and blind belief is decided only by the outcome. But neither Abraham nor I am God—we can’t see what lies ahead. To believe in someone means staking your heart on something intangible. Whether that leads to salvation—or damnation—no one can say for sure.
Bang! Bang!
While I was deep in thought, someone pounded on the door. I looked outside. The sun was already beginning to set. I stood in front of the front door and hesitated for a long time, wondering whether to open it.
The boy who used to just have an intense gaze… the boy who turned out to be better than I expected… the boy who became a sweet friend… and eventually, someone I now found lovely and precious—Park Sion.
I had already fallen for Park Sion.
‘You can trust me.’
‘Don’t trust Park Sion.’
‘I can’t trust you…’
‘Just believe in Park Sion.’
Suddenly, a mess of voices tangled inside my head. Some people told me to trust Park Sion. Others told me not to. But I already knew what choice I would make. The moment I opened the door and saw his face, this supposed dilemma would cease to matter.
It didn’t take long for the rage that had reached the top of my head to cool. And the first image that popped into my head once it did… was Park Sion standing out in the hallway, head down, frozen in place.
"Seonwoo."
Park Sion’s voice came from outside the door.
"Seonwoo, Seonwoo…"
I slowly opened the door. Standing there was Park Sion, with a split lip. See? I told you. It’s not about trust anymore.
"You… again…"
"Seonwoo."
The second the door opened, Park Sion pulled me into his arms. He held me so tight I couldn’t breathe. His hands gripped me desperately. As he rubbed his face into my neck, he took a deep breath. His breath trembled like someone on the verge of tears.
"It was my fault. I’m sorry…"
"……"
"I’m sorry… I was wrong…"
I steadied my legs, which were about to give out, and wrapped my arms around his back as he leaned all his weight into me like he might collapse.
"Let me see your face."
"I’m sorry. I’m really sorry."
"I get it. So let me see your face."
I looked straight into his anxious eyes. Blood had gathered where his lip was split. The wound wasn’t as bad as last time, but my heart still dropped with a sharp chill. I wiped the blood from the corner of his mouth with my fingers. Park Sion just stared at me with trembling eyes.
"Did your dad hit you again?"
"Yeah."
"Because you hit Youngjin?"
"No. Because I said I wasn’t going to the family event tomorrow…"
"Then why not just go?"
"If I went, I wouldn’t get to see you this weekend."
Yeah… this is the you I know. The one who burrows into me every chance he gets. The one who clings to me with a kind of excessive affection I still don’t fully understand.
Park Sion pressed his face into my chest again. I tried to calm him down. After guiding him to sit on the sofa, I went and washed my hands like last time. Then I grabbed some ointment from the drawer and sat back in front of him. His teary eyes followed me. I quietly withstood his gaze.
"Yoon Seonwoo."
"What."
"Are you upset?"
"…Why would you ask something so obvious?"
"You don’t look upset. You’re not even crying."
Park Sion cupped my cheek in his hand. I batted it away and applied ointment to his split lip.
Of course I’m upset. The moment I saw that cut on your face, my heart plummeted to the floor. My chest was heavy. As I checked if he had any other wounds, I looked over his pale neck. I’d grabbed his collar earlier—what if I left a mark? The image of him ruthlessly stomping on Youngjin was already fading like a fog.
"Youngjin knows about us."
My hand paused mid-application. Park Sion pulled my arm down and laced our fingers together.
"I just told him. That we like each other."
"…What?"
"I think Youngjin likes you."
"What kind of nonsense—"
"I’m just… so scared. I feel like I’m gonna die from how scared I am, Seonwoo…"
"You’ve got it wrong. Why would Youngjin like me…"
My brow furrowed. It was ridiculous. But Park Sion genuinely looked scared. He slowly tried to control his breathing, resting his head on my shoulder. His broad shoulders trembled faintly.
"Shin Jaeyoung said he overheard Youngjin and Kim Shinju talking at the birthday party. Said Youngjin told Shinju he was into you…"
"……"
"You know Youngjin’s close with Kim Shinju… right?"
At the sudden mention of that repulsive name, my fingertips went cold. I knew Youngjin knew Kim Shinju, but close? My brain felt like it blanked out for a moment.
"When I heard that, I told him we were dating so he wouldn’t pull anything. I wanted to ask you first, but you always thought Youngjin was a good guy. I was afraid your heart would waver, so I tried to handle it myself. But… but Youngjin still doesn’t believe me."
"……"
"He keeps saying you’re not gay. That there’s no way you could actually like me…"
So that’s why Youngjin suddenly said he couldn’t trust me? Why he started teaching me self-defense out of nowhere, saying he believed in me?
"He said he couldn’t even confess to you because he was scared you’d crack his skull, and now I’m claiming we’re dating…"
"That’s ridiculous…"
"He says you can’t like me. That I must be forcing you."
"……"
"But that’s not true, right? That’s not true, is it, Seonwoo?"
Park Sion called my name desperately. His eyes wavered as he constantly brushed my cheek. He kept trying to make eye contact, watching for my reaction. He looked utterly anxious.
"So when you lied to me, and I saw you hugging Youngjin… I just snapped. I was so mad at you…"
"This is absurd. Why would Youngjin—"
"He was always overly friendly with you. Always texting. Didn’t that feel like too much?"
"……"
"…You seriously didn’t notice?"
Not even once. Yeah, Youngjin was affectionate, but it never crossed the line of friendship. His messages, the way he looked at me—it was all light, simple.
Was I just that dense? Did I mistake all his affection for platonic friendship because I didn’t want to see it? Still, could I really have missed every sign?
"I’m scared of losing you. Scared that maybe, like Youngjin says, you don’t even like me."
"Hold on. I don’t get this situation at all."
"What…?"
"Make it make sense. Why would Youngjin just—"
"You don’t believe me?"
His black eyes, darkened by fear, quivered like glass. In those murky eyes, I saw myself reflected completely. Park Sion’s face leaned in. His trembling breath brushed past my nose.
"Why… do you keep making me feel like this…"
"No, it’s not that I don’t trust you—"
"Please don’t make me feel like this."
Like he was trying to swallow back tears, Park Sion bit his red lips. I reached out and gently ran my hand through his hair.
"What are you even scared of?"
"You. You make me scared."
His trembling breath spilled out as his fingers traced the edge of my lips. Every time those cool fingers touched me, I flinched.
"I told you I like you. It’s not Youngjin—it’s you I like."
"Really?"
"…Of course."
But at my answer, Park Sion suddenly grimaced. Then he turned his head away, avoiding my eyes. He murmured between clenched teeth.
"…Liar."
"What?"
"You’re lying. You don’t like me."
The hand that had been touching my lips dropped to the floor. He let out a choked breath and buried his face in his palms. I quickly reached out and cupped his cheeks. I tilted his head up and looked into his eyes. His pained expression was so raw it hurt to breathe.
"Why the hell would I lie about that? I do like you."
"I can’t believe it."
"You can."
I answered firmly, trying to extinguish his fear. But Park Sion shook his head faintly. He avoided my gaze, which was something he never did.
"…If you like me, then why did you leave me earlier?"
Tears welled in his eyes. His lips trembled slightly as he spoke. I couldn’t find words. Seeing Park Sion with those drooped shoulders, head down—it stabbed into my chest like broken glass. A wave of guilt washed over me.
"If you liked me, how could you leave like that…"
"I was scared we’d fight even worse if I stayed…"
"No. You just left because it was easier for you."
Park Sion’s eyes sharpened. He clutched my arm and demanded,
"You said I was pretty. That you cherished me. That you liked me—"
"Park Sion."
"If you like me, then don’t do that. You’re supposed to forgive me no matter what. You’re supposed to stay by my side even when it’s hard…"
The kind of love Park Sion was describing was too blind, too self-destructive. I couldn’t agree with a single part of his twisted logic. But I didn’t argue. Instead, I kissed his cheek gently. I poured all the affection he doubted into that kiss.
"I’m sorry. I’m really sorry, Park Sion."
"……"
"I didn’t know. I didn’t know you were this scared. When I said I liked you, I meant it. I don’t care what anyone else says. I like you. I really like you."
So whether or not I should trust you… that doesn’t matter to me anymore.
I swallowed down the words I couldn’t say aloud.