Jayjay’s POV Percy was still sitting on the arm of the sofa beside me, looking far too pleased with himself after successfully turning four jealous idiots from Queen’s Protector into a morning crisis.
I looked at him.
He smiled.
I narrowed my eyes.
He smiled wider.
“Don’t.” “Yes, baby.” I sighed.
I really didn’t have the energy for him today.
My body felt heavy.
My head was hurting slightly, and there was that familiar uncomfortable pressure in my chest that usually came when I was mentally exhausted.
I slowly stood up.
Percy immediately noticed.
“Baby?” “I’m going upstairs.” His expression changed.
“Why?” “I’m tired.” He looked at me carefully.
“You okay?” “I’m fine, Perse.” He didn’t look convinced.
But he knew better than to push me when I was already irritated.
I started walking toward the staircase.
Aris watched me silently.
Angelo’s eyes followed me too.
Keifer didn’t say anything.
Yuri and David also became quiet.
I didn’t look at anyone.
I just walked upstairs.
One step.
Then another.
By the time I reached my room, the noise from downstairs had faded.
I closed the door behind me.
Finally.
Silence.
I stood there for a few seconds.
My room was quiet.
Peaceful.
But my mind wasn’t.
I slowly walked toward my study table and sat down.
I rubbed my forehead.
I really wasn’t feeling well.
Not just physically.
Mentally too.
Yesterday had taken more out of me than I wanted to admit.
I opened the drawer and took out my prescribed medication.
I looked at the labels for a moment before taking my usual daily dose with water, exactly as prescribed.
I placed everything back carefully.
Then I took the medication I normally used for my symptoms, again following the prescription.
I wasn’t trying to think about anything anymore.
I just wanted my mind to stop.
I walked toward my bed.
Pulled the blanket over myself.
And closed my eyes.
But my brain had other plans.
Yesterday.
Everything from yesterday kept coming back.
Percy’s threats.
The unknown messages.
The people watching.
The danger.
Then Keifer.
His face.
His silence.
Everything between us.
I turned slightly in bed.
Then Aris.
My expression tightened.
He had hidden the truth from me.
The truth that he was my brother.
My own brother.
And I still couldn’t understand why.
Why had he kept something so important from me?
Why had he allowed me to live without knowing?
My chest tightened.
I closed my eyes harder.
I didn’t want to think about it.
But the memories kept coming.
Everything I had been carrying.
Everything I had never said.
Everything I had hidden behind a calm face.
Behind silence.
Behind anger.
Behind jokes.
Behind the Queen.
Everyone thought I was strong.
Maybe I was.
But being strong didn’t mean I wasn’t tired.
A tear slowly escaped from the corner of my eye.
I wiped it away without opening my eyes.
“Enough…” My voice was barely a whisper.
“I don’t want to think anymore.” I pulled the blanket closer.
Slowly, my thoughts became heavier.
The room became quieter.
My breathing steadied.
And eventually…
exhaustion won.
I fell asleep.
Aris’s POV I was sitting alone in my room.
And I couldn’t stop thinking about Jay.
She was still angry with me.
I knew it.
I deserved it.
But knowing that didn’t make it easier.
I had tried to think of what I could say to her.
An apology.
A proper one.
Not an excuse.
Not another explanation.
Just the truth.
I’m sorry.
But somehow, even those two words felt too small.
I leaned back against my chair.
I closed my eyes.
I remembered Jay from before.
The way she used to look at me.
The way she trusted me.
The way she could be annoying one second and make me laugh the next.
Now?
She barely looked at me.
When she did…
there was anger in her eyes.
And hurt.
I swallowed hard.
“I don’t know how to fix this.” My voice sounded broken even to me.
I looked down.
“She used to look at me like I was someone she could trust.” I paused.
“Now she looks at me like I’m another person who hurt her.” That thought hurt more than I expected.
I knew I couldn’t keep avoiding her.
I had to talk to her.
Even if she didn’t forgive me.
Even if she shouted.
Even if she told me to leave.
At least I needed to try.
I stood up.
And walked toward her room.
I stopped outside Jay’s door.
I raised my hand.
Knocked softly.
Nothing.
I knocked again.
Still nothing.
“Jay?” Silence.
I slowly opened the door.
My eyes immediately found her.
She was asleep.
Her face was peaceful.
So peaceful that for a moment I forgot everything else.
She looked exhausted.
I stood there quietly.
I had come here to apologize.
But waking her up didn’t feel right.
Not now.
She needed rest.
I took a small breath.
I’ll come back later.
I carefully stepped backward.
My hand reached for the door.
I began closing it.
Then something caught my eye.
The study table.
There was a small medicine bottle sitting on it.
I stopped.
My eyebrows pulled together.
I looked at Jay.
Then back at the bottle.
Something about it made me uneasy.
I walked toward the table.
I picked up the bottle carefully.
I read the label.
It was prescribed medication intended to help with sleep.
My stomach dropped slightly.
“Sleep medication…?” I looked toward Jay again.
She was still sleeping.
I knew she had trouble sleeping sometimes.
But I had never realized it was this serious.
I slowly placed the bottle back.
Then my eyes moved toward the drawers underneath the table.
I hesitated.
I knew I shouldn’t invade her privacy.
But something inside me kept telling me to look.
Not curiosity.
Concern.
I opened the first drawer.
Paper.
A few notebooks.
Pens.
Stationery.
Nothing unusual.
I closed it.
I opened the second.
More papers.
Stationery.
Some documents.
Nothing.
Then I looked at the third drawer.
I slowly pulled it open.
And froze.
My entire body went still.
The drawer was filled with medication bottles.
Not one.
Not two.
So many.
My eyes widened.
I slowly picked up one bottle.
Then another.
The labels were different.
One was for anxiety-related symptoms.
Another was prescribed for severe headaches.
Another was for panic symptoms.
There were medications related to trauma treatment.
Medication for sleep.
Medication for physical symptoms that could worsen during severe stress.
Everything was properly labeled.
Prescription bottles.
Instructions attached.
My fingers started shaking.
I stared at the drawer.
Then at the bottles.
Then back at the drawer.
“No…” My voice cracked.
I slowly crouched beside the table.
How long?
How long had she been taking all of this?
How much had she been hiding?
I picked up another bottle.
Read the label.
My vision blurred.
Not because I couldn’t read it.
Because tears were filling my eyes.
I blinked quickly.
But one tear escaped.
Then another.
My breathing became uneven.
I looked toward Jay.
She was still asleep.
Peacefully.
Like nothing was wrong.
Like she wasn’t carrying an entire war inside her.
Like she hadn’t been fighting something every single day.
I whispered, “Jay…” My voice broke.
She didn’t move.
I looked at the medication again.
And suddenly everything felt different.
All those moments.
Her sudden silence.
Her headaches.
The times she looked exhausted.
The moments when she suddenly needed to be alone.
The way she sometimes froze.
The way she hid everything behind that expressionless face.
I had seen those things.
But I hadn’t understood them.
Or maybe…
I hadn’t tried hard enough to understand them.
My eyes burned.
I carefully placed every bottle back exactly where it had been.
I closed the third drawer.
Then the second.
Then the first.
I made sure everything looked untouched.
I didn’t want her to wake up and feel like someone had invaded the one private place she had.
I stood there for a moment.
Looking at her.
She looked so young while sleeping.
Not the fearless girl everyone saw.
Not the person everyone expected to handle everything.
Just Jay.
My little sister.
The sister I had failed.
My lips trembled.
“I’m sorry.” She didn’t hear me.
Maybe that was better.
Because I didn’t deserve her forgiveness yet.
I quietly walked out.
I closed the door behind me.
And stood in the hallway.
For several seconds…
I couldn’t move.
I finally went back to my room.
The moment I closed the door, my legs felt weak.
I sat down on the edge of my bed.
My hands were still shaking.
I stared at them.
Then I remembered everything.
The incident.
The stabbing.
Jay had stabbed me.
I had been hurt.
I had been angry.
I had felt betrayed.
But now…
I understood something I hadn’t allowed myself to understand before.
She wasn’t herself that day.
She had been overwhelmed.
Traumatized.
Not thinking clearly.
And I had known she was struggling.
But instead of asking her what was happening…
I became cold.
I punished her with my silence.
I made her feel guilty.
My eyes filled again.
“She stabbed me…” I whispered.
I swallowed.
“But it wasn’t her fault.” I looked down.
“She wasn’t in her senses.” My voice became quieter.
“She was suffering.” I remembered the look on her face afterward.
The confusion.
The fear.
The pain.
And what had I done?
I had turned away.
I had acted like she had intentionally hurt me.
I pressed my palms against my face.
“I should’ve taken care of you.” A tear fell onto my hand.
“I should’ve protected you.” Another.
“I should’ve asked you what was wrong.” My breathing shook.
“I should’ve noticed.” I slowly lowered my hands.
Instead…
I had neglected her.
I had made her carry everything alone.
I had been so focused on my own pain that I never stopped to ask how much pain she was already carrying.
My chest tightened.
“I punished you…” I whispered.
“For something you weren’t even fully conscious of.” I looked toward the door.
As if I could somehow see through it.
As if Jay were standing on the other side.
“I was supposed to be your brother.” My voice broke.
“And I failed.” Silence.
I wiped my tears.
But they kept coming.
For the first time, I wasn’t angry about what Jay had done.
I wasn’t thinking about my wound.
I wasn’t thinking about my pride.
I was thinking about her.
About the girl sleeping alone upstairs.
The girl who had been taking medication just to get through things I hadn’t even known she was fighting.
And suddenly…
I understood.
Jay wasn’t just angry with me.
She was hurting.
She had been hurting for a long time.
And I had made it worse.
I closed my eyes.
“I’m going to fix this.” My voice was quiet.
“I don’t know how.” I took a shaky breath.
“But I’m going to.” Because this time…
I wasn’t going to ask my sister to forgive me.
I was going to become someone who deserved her trust again.