The two days since She Xiao returned left Lin Xigu feeling like he was walking on air. It was dizzying and disorienting, as if none of it was real.
Sometimes, when he snapped out of his daze long enough to see She Xiao sitting beside him, a strange sense of disbelief would wash over him. He couldn’t quite convince himself that this was truly happening. She Xiao seemed to understand how he was feeling and every time Lin Xigu turned to stare at him, She Xiao would flash him a smile.
That smile would soothe Lin Xigu just enough and he’d offer She Xiao a sweet smile of his own in return.
That his days could look like this was something Lin Xigu had never dared to imagine before.
But life goes on, and everyone has to return to reality at some point. No matter how wonderful She Xiao was, Lin Xigu couldn’t spend every day at home watching him. Monday came, and he had to go back to work and his internship. After three days away, there was bound to be a mountain of tasks waiting for him. He’d need to be as efficient as possible during the day—otherwise, he’d end up working overtime after hours.
Lin Xigu had wanted to let She Xiao sleep in a little longer, but when he opened his eyes, She Xiao was already awake. Their gazes met, and She Xiao blinked once before leaning in to place a soft kiss on the tip of his nose.
Lin Xigu couldn’t help but laugh. He touched his nose, his voice still scratchy from sleep as he murmured, “Why don’t you sleep in a little longer…?”
She Xiao replied simply, “I’m not tired anymore.”
Lin Xigu’s heart felt fit to burst. Waking up next to She Xiao and receiving a kiss first thing in the morning was such a pure, quiet happiness that he could hardly believe it was real. The smile on his face didn’t falter as he said, “You should go back to bed after I leave for work.”
She Xiao shook his head. “No, I’m coming with you.”
Lin Xigu’s smile grew wider, a warmth spreading through him that laid the groundwork for a great day to come.
She Xiao didn’t have a driver’s license, nor did he know how to drive. Lin Xigu parked in the company’s underground lot. There was still time to spare so neither of them moved to get out of the car.
“She Xiao, why don’t you go see your mom during the day?” Lin Xigu suggested. “Then you can meet me here after work, and we’ll head home together. Or I can pick you up—whatever works.”
She Xiao gave a quiet “Mn” in response and added, “I’ll be here waiting.”
“Alright,” Lin Xigu replied with another smile, his fingers brushing over She Xiao’s hand. “I’ll sign you up for driving school today, but let’s not start right away. Let’s take a couple of weeks off first—no plans, no responsibilities. It’ll just be time to rest and adjust. Does that sound good?”
She Xiao didn’t say much, as usual. Whatever Lin Xigu suggested, he simply nodded his agreement, with a kind of steady reassurance that put Lin Xigu at ease despite his silence.
Lin Xigu unbuckled his seatbelt and leaned over, pressing a gentle kiss to She Xiao’s lips. She Xiao lifted a hand, loosely wrapping it around Lin Xigu’s back as he returned the kiss.
Before getting out of the car, Lin Xigu gazed into She Xiao’s eyes and said, “You’re the best. The brightest. You were once the dazzling She Xiao, and you still are. You will be in the future too, sooner or later.”
She Xiao smiled faintly, saying nothing.
Lin Xigu continued, “You’re going to be so strong. I’m waiting for you to soar and take me with you. I’ve worked so hard these past few years just so I can keep up with you, to stand shoulder to shoulder with you. But there’s no rush. Let’s take our time and go at our own pace. Right now, I only want to…”
Lin Xigu hesitated, pressing his lips together as a shy smile crept across his face. He glanced at She Xiao’s lips and couldn’t help but lean in for another kiss. Then, in a quieter voice, he continued, “I just want to see you well. All I need is for us to be together. Let me make up for the last five years. Is that okay?”
She Xiao rubbed the back of Lin Xigu’s head, his thumb brushing lightly over his ear. A low chuckle escaped him as he gave a soft “Mn,” followed by a simple, “Okay.”
Lin Xigu had always been a thoughtful boy, and he had grown into a thoughtful young man. He considered everyone’s needs carefully before making sure every piece of the plan was in place, and would then gently seek the other person’s input, as if afraid of overstepping.
As he stepped into the elevator, he waved at She Xiao. She Xiao gave him a small smile, waiting until the elevator doors closed before turning to leave.
Lin Xigu caught one last glimpse of She Xiao before the doors closed and was again struck by a surreal feeling. The way She Xiao’s khaki pants made his legs look so long, the effortless cool he exuded even in a simple hoodie, the faint buzz of stubble on his scalp… Lin Xigu chuckled to himself—didn’t he still look just like a high school delinquent?
Lin Xigu transformed into a work machine as soon as he got to work. His efficiency was through the roof. By midday, he’d already cleared out the tasks from the past two days. He had always been productive, but never this productive. His good mood was practically written across his face and he was grinning through every conversation.
“Xiao-Lin, you’re so festive today! Something good happen?” one of the office ladies teased.
Lin Xigu shook his head with a secret smile.
Lin Xigu took advantage of his coffee break to text She Xiao. He hemmed and hawed for a long time, typing and deleting what he wrote before only sending She Xiao’s name, followed by a smiling emoji.
She Xiao replied two minutes later. Lin Xigu laughed out loud as soon as he read the message.
The screen displayed:
33
Lin Xigu’s eyes softened instantly, reddening at the same time. Those two long-forgotten numbers were magnetic, and he couldn’t put words to how he felt as he read them. It was the first time in years that the message had appeared on his phone, and he liked the sight of it so much it made his chest ache.
His heart still felt numb, but it wasn’t just numb with fondness. There was so much more inside him—regret over the five years that had passed in the blink of an eye, and the memories he hadn’t dared to revisit until now, memories he could finally allow himself to revisit.
Those two “3”s were too precious. Years later, you’re still the same you.
Lin Xigu put his phone away, and was filled with a surge of strength. Life felt full of hope now. With his boyfriend by his side, it was time for him to also pick up the pace, or else he wouldn’t be able to keep up when She Xiao took flight again.
That afternoon, his manager met with him in her office and gave him a stack of business cases to review. As Lin Xigu accepted the binder and turned to leave, she added, “Just one moment, xiao-Lin.”
Lin Xigu looked back and smiled. “What is it, Jie?”
His manager thought for a moment, then asked, “Two of your fellow interns approached me this morning to express that they would like to stay on full-time after their internships end. What about you? Are you interested?”
Lin Xigu considered the proposal. “I can’t say I’ve thought about it yet, Jie. I think you should leave me out of it for now. If there are a limited number of positions available, you should extend the offer to them first.”
“You don’t want to stay?” His manager asked.
Smiling politely, Lin Xigu said plainly, “I honestly haven’t thought that far ahead yet. And I may have to return to campus full-time to finish my thesis. My supervisor’s been hounding me for it.”
His manager appraised him, then nodded. “Okay, I understand. As you were.”
Lin Xigu nodded and turned to leave.
He couldn’t be too direct in front of his manager. In truth, he never planned to stay from the outset. He had only accepted the internship to fill in for a classmate from his program, and because he had heard that the job was exceptionally demanding.
He used to enjoy keeping himself busy and would have gladly filled all twenty-four hours of the day with plans if he could. But things were different now.
That day, Lin Xigu still ended up working an extra half hour, though his mind was elsewhere the whole time. She Xiao texted, saying he was waiting in the parking lot and Lin Xigu wanted nothing more than to rush downstairs and go home, but he still had to finish the work at hand.
When he finally finished his tasks, Lin Xigu sorted the files and sent them to his colleagues’ respective inboxes. He turned to the few still working late and said, “I’m done here, I’m heading out.”
“Done so early?” one of his coworkers asked.
“Just a few loose ends that I’ll take care of tomorrow morning. You guys hang in there.”
“Tch, you’re actually in a hurry to get home? Aren’t you usually the first to arrive and the last to leave?” The coworker teased.
As he put on his coat, Lin Xigu chuckled and said, “Yeah, but I’ll probably be in a bit of a rush every day from now on. My partner’s waiting for me downstairs.”
Everyone who overheard him looked up in surprise, and a female intern said quietly, “Whoa, xiao-Lin. So you’re not single after all?”
Lin Xigu shook his head. “Never was, I haven’t been single in a long time. I guess you could say my partner and I were high school sweethearts.”
His eyes were smiling as he spoke. It was impossible to suppress the urge to humble-brag about his boyfriend. He took off his work badge and turned off his computer, then waved to his coworkers, “I’m heading out.”
His curious female coworkers still had more questions that they wanted to ask but Lin Xigu had left in too much of a hurry.
The first thing Lin Xigu saw when he stepped out of the elevator was She Xiao waiting beside his car with his hands in his pockets, clean-shaven and standing tall. She Xiao looked up at the sound of the elevator and waited patiently for Lin Xigu to walk over to him.
Lin Xigu smiled before he even said a word. “Good evening, She Xiao.”
She Xiao gave Lin Xigu’s neck a gentle squeeze.
It tickled. Lin Xigu shrank his neck slightly.
There was a minor traffic jam on the drive back. “It’s a bit congested right now,” Lin Xigu said. “It could be an hour before we get home.”
“No rush,” She Xiao said.
Lin Xigu was worried about him feeling bored, so he continued, “How was Ayi today? I haven’t visited her in a while. It’s been so busy at work recently, and… well… the closer it got to your homecoming, the more I tried not to dwell on it too much, so I was also a little reluctant about seeing her in-person.”
Lin Xigu felt slightly self-conscious after this confession, fidgeting with his ear. “You two… look too much alike.”
She Xiao looked at him, saying nothing, but touched his knuckle to Lin Xigu’s face.
Lin Xigu chuckled. “I’m a coward. Don’t laugh at me.”
She Xiao’s hands were not as cold as they used to be. The feeling it left on his cheek was quite warm. He was gentle down to the tips of his fingers.
Lin Xigu wanted to elaborate but the radio was interrupted by the sound of his ringtone. Lin Xigu glanced at the screen which showed “Princess” as the caller.
His phone was connected to his car’s Bluetooth so the audio came through the speakers as soon as the call connected. He didn’t get a chance to speak before the speakers started blasting the vibrant voice of his “sworn brother” Li Balei at maximum volume. “Lin Xigu! Lin Xigu, Lin Xigu, Lin Xigu! How are you feeling today? If you feel like crap, let me tell you the funniest story about this infuriating idiot. It’s sure to make you forget all your troubles and will definitely make you laugh. So how about it?”
Lin Xigu hastily turned down the volume. “I’m not home yet. And actually, I feel great, but it sounds to me like you’re having a bad day?”
“Ugh, that’s the understatement of the century!” Li Balei sounded as though she was about to lose her mind. Lin Xigu smiled weakly as she continued, “I’m so mad, I’m going to flip! Why are there so many women who are such you-know-whats! Argh!”
The car speakers made her string of exclamations blast through their eardrums. Lin Xigu turned the volume lower. “Go on, what happened?”
“It’s that Jingjing what’s-her-face!” Her voice was nasally, sounding as though she was so mad that she was going to cry. “Forget it, I’m not going to make you listen. You have enough going on as it is; I don’t want to add more to your plate. Scum like her isn’t worth anyone’s time of day; I’ll suffer in private.”
Without waiting for Lin Xigu to respond, she continued, “Free up your calendar for me this week. Don’t forget! You have to clear your schedule this weekend! It’s time to get you out of the house again. Last month, you said you were busy so I let you wriggle out of it. But this week, you’re gonna have to touch grass no matter what. Otherwise, I’m going to show up at your house and kidnap you!”
Lin Xigu chuckled and glanced at She Xiao sitting in the passenger seat. “Alright, I’ll meet you at my place then.”
Li Balei’s voice was disapproving. “Stop giving me the runaround. We agreed we’d get you out of the house at least once a month. Don’t you know how valuable Dr. Li’s time is? You only just refilled your prescription last month. Did you honestly think I didn’t know about that?”
At this, She Xiao whipped around to look at him. Lin Xigu felt a pang of guilt, as though he had just been caught red-handed, and nearly hung up by accident.
“Oi, Dr. Li’s talking to you, are you listening? Don’t you play deaf with me, Lin Xigu!” Li Balei’s voice was still as boisterous as ever.
“I’m listening,” Lin Xigu said. “In any case, you should still drop by this week; I have news to share. I’m hanging up now—still driving, you know.”
Lin Xigu ended the call as soon as he was done speaking. She Xiao was still frowning at him.
Li Balei was going to be the death of him, Lin Xigu thought.
Still staring, She Xiao asked quietly, “What prescription?”
Lin Xigu coughed, then answered sheepishly, “Just…sleep medication.”
She Xiao’s gaze was still trained on his face. Lin Xigu thought he would ask again but at last, he merely turned his head to look out the passenger window. Lin Xigu bit his lip and, when he parked the car again, reached out and lightly placed his hand on She Xiao’s leg.
When She Xiao looked over, Lin Xigu took his hand and swung it gently.
Translator’s Note: Back from hiatus! 2025 will be the year I finish this. *Determined face*