“Hmm…” Uval drew my attention, pulling me out of my own thoughts.
This individual is a Devaronian and one of the trackers who studied alongside my father.
Honestly, whenever he’s around, I always feel uneasy.
And when he looks at me like that, I just want to hide.
Or yell something like, “What are you staring at, don’t you like me?
Congratulations, I don’t like you either!” “What is it, Uval?
Don’t you like my son’s progress?” my mother cut in.
She was practically glowing, happy with my advancements.
Well, yeah, I might be small, but I’m fierce, just like she was at my age.
“That’s not the point, Aala.
Don’t you think it’s time for him to go to the temple?
After all, it’s been two years since you refused to hand him over to Master Souru,” the Devaronian said, not even raising an eyebrow as he shifted his gaze to my mother.
“I know that sham…” my mother muttered, frowning.
“No.
I think I can teach him much better.
At least during the youngling period.” “That may be so, but his power…” he drawled.
“It’s too restless.
If you haven’t noticed, he can’t sit still for a moment.
He’s constantly breaking something, destroying something, just doing something.
Tell him to stand still for a minute, and he’ll stand on his head out of spite!
No discipline, no respect for his elders.” “And was I any different?” my mother grinned.
“Even now, name me one person I address formally.” “Whoa…” I drew out, impressed by her audacity.
I definitely have room to grow.
To so subtly tell someone to get lost — I’ll probably never be able to do that.
But she did, and I know it.
“That’s not the point, Aala.” “Then what is?” “His balance has been disturbed since birth,” Uval said bluntly, eyeing me with a grim look.
“The dark side dominates the light.
It’s visible in his eyes — there’s always a double bottom there.” .” .
.” I just stood there, silent, stunned.
“Look for yourself,” he said, pointing at me.
My mother crouched down and, frowning, started peering into my eyes.
I just stood there and looked back, not knowing where to go.
But then her face relaxed and lit up with a smile.
“Well, I’m looking.
And I see a pair of gray eyes.
A little scared, but so strong…
so resilient…
so mine,” she pressed me to her chest and stroked my head.
“My beloved.” “As you wish,” Uval shrugged.
“I’ve warned you.
Your son is far from as simple as he seems.
Keep that in mind.
There’s an opinion that by the time he’s ten, he’ll be exiled to Bogan…” “SLAP!” the sound of a slap echoed.
I froze like a pillar and looked toward Uval, next to whom my mother was standing.
Just like that, and she was already there.
I didn’t even notice how she got there.
Her aura had changed, her montrals were stirring under the pressure of the Force, and an indescribable bloodlust radiated from her.
And while one hand delivered the blow, the other grabbed the Devaronian by the collar, preventing him from flying back.
But what scared me more was that I was happy.
I was happy about this aura and felt more than comfortable, while Uval turned white.
“Ashshar onu sha’ran…
*” she hissed furiously in Togruta, shoving the old acquaintance away.
Uval pulled himself together, put on a stoic face, and silently left.
“Mom?” I quietly called out when the alien disappeared around the corner.
Hearing me, the aura around my mother vanished, and the one who turned to me was the same one who held me in her arms and read me fairy tales.
“Yes?” she walked over casually, tousling my hair.
“What is it, sweetie?” “What was he talking about?
And what does Bogan have to do with it?” She smiled sadly, but took my hand and led me toward the house, answering: “That’s…
a long story.” I looked around, and making sure no one was nearby, turned back to her.
With a sigh, she began to speak.
“You see…
it started even before you were born.
I was never known for obedience or discipline.
What’s more, I always had problems with that, which is why I was seriously at risk of being sent to Bogan.
I was very angry back then.
Very.
And it was hard for me to restore balance in the Force.” “Were they hurting you?” “Yes, Shade.
For a time, they hurt me.
And I hurt others.
Everything was complicated there.
From the very beginning of my path, I was used to going against other people’s opinions and doing things my own way, regardless of anything.
Though, my ‘way’ might come from someone else’s opinion, or simply coincide with it.
And in this, you are very much like me.
Your restlessness, your fervor, your assertiveness…” she ruffled my hair, and wrapping an arm around me, pulled me close.
“But how did you manage to get away from the problems?” “I didn’t get away,” she shrugged.
“I’m just strong enough to confirm my right to speak with blood.
Usually someone else’s.
Considering that I react very negatively to any encroachment on what’s mine, some eventually realized — it’s better not to touch this pretty girl and to steer clear of her.” “But doesn’t that complicate relations in the Order?
An uncontrollable fighter is a very dangerous threat, first and foremost to the Order itself.” “Where did you learn words like that?” she looked at me with a raised eyebrow.
“Uh, I read it in a book,” I looked away, realizing that a child my age simply shouldn’t be using such complex words.
“I see.” “Anyway, besides the downsides, I have my pluses,” she stopped, crouching down to me.
“Yes, I’m willful.
I don’t care about authority, I don’t care about the person I’m talking to; all that matters to me are my friends, my family,” she pressed me to herself for a few more seconds and squeezed me.
Ooh, I felt like a plush toy.
“And my mission.
Which I will complete.
Besides, you know that our species is, by nature, incredibly social creatures.
When I was young…
before I became a Je’daii, I had what you might call many friends.
Although…
now I realize they weren’t really my friends, but back then everything looked different.
Despite that, I was loyal to them.
I was ready to tear anyone to shreds with my teeth, like a wild beast, if my group was in danger.
That’s one of the reasons I ended up in the Order.” “And what happened to those guys?” “Nothing good, Shade.
After I left for the Order, the group disbanded and I never saw them again.” But a shadow flickered across her face, and something slipped through her emotions that I couldn’t miss.
Not wanting to dwell on that topic, I tried to change direction: “Mom, but then why?” It was a stupid question, but I couldn’t not ask it.
I knew the traditions of my past world, but I didn’t understand my new people well.
So…
“Why what?” she tilted her head cutely in confusion.
I’d noticed by chance that this same gesture had unconsciously passed on to me.
“If everything is as you say, why are we ready to protect?” “Where did you get that idea?!” “From the other kids.
They don’t…
like me very much.
And they keep their distance.
I definitely wouldn’t protect them.” “Hmm…
it’s nothing, Shade.
They’ll come around, believe me.
And in time, they’ll try to be your friends themselves.
Right now they’re just stupid and don’t understand who you are.
But later…
they’ll wise up.
And our friends — real friends, not those fools I had when I was young — are family members.
And we will always stand up for them, always help them, and share our last supplies.
That’s why we’ve always had plenty of friends.
Even I did.
And I’ll note that I’m toxic, rude, and according to many guys, a very unpleasant girl.
Well, that’s the reputation I had during my training,” she added with a smile.
“And then I cemented it.
It’s so much fun!
So everything will be fine, don’t worry about it.” “You think?” “Yes.” “And Uval?
His words about…
that I’m…
well, not like that.” “You know you’re old enough now, and that soon you’ll pass your exams and enter the temple, but you still don’t have a single friend.
That bothers him, but there’s nothing wrong with it.
Your interest is entirely focused on understanding the Force, our culture, language, technology, combat techniques, but not on other people.
The strange thing is that, as long as I can remember, there was always some kind of group around me.
Neighbors I knew, classmates, travel companions…
I always had someone around.
Rivals too, of course, but still.
You, on the other hand, go your own way entirely, not paying attention to others.
At least for now.
And some find that strange and start to worry.
But there’s nothing strange about it, Shade, it’s perfectly normal.
And also, in this, you’re like your father.
He didn’t socialize with others either.
In the end, you know what happened to him and where his path led.” “Uh-huh.
But it’s not like I don’t pay attention to others at all,” I scoffed skeptically.
“It’s just that I want to be very much like you,” I noticed the corners of her lips curl up slightly.
“I want to be strong enough so that when real friends appear, I can protect them.
I want to be myself, without any pretense.
I don’t want to keep my feelings in check.
And I won’t.
I want to be real.
And I want to find friends like you have now!
I want to make my own decisions, not the ones others dictate to me.
Just like you.” “There!
That’s exactly why Uval is wrong.
You’re not dark at all — your light is just hidden deep inside, just like it was hidden in me once.
Yes, you’re a little different, but nothing more.
And anyone who says otherwise can go straight into a Sarlacc’s mouth!” she finished, smiling cheerfully.
“Right, Shade.
You don’t need to be someone else.
Just be yourself, and everything will come to you.” And then she leaned in and whispered conspiratorially, “And you’ll even find a girl — or rather, she’ll find you herself, I know; the boys used to chase after me in droves.” I immediately blushed and hid in my collar.
“You’ll introduce me to her, won’t you?” “Mom!!!” * * * “Ow, ow, ow, ooh-m-m-m,” I gritted my teeth, dropping the blade and shaking my hand.
Yeah…
a wooden sword was much easier, and a lot less painful.
“Again,” my mother returned to her starting position.
“Give me a second,” I said, flexing my fingers, which had taken a beating from the blunt but still iron sword, and reinforced my flesh with the Force again.
Without that, I’d have had mincemeat instead of fingers long ago, since I got hit hard and often.
Clenching and unclenching my fist, I picked up the weapon.
My muscles ached, my bones creaked, my arms were tired of taking hits over and over.
But there was nothing to be done about it.
Taking a stance, I prepared for the duel.
A moment, and we simultaneously met in a clinch, followed by a series of quick strikes that I somehow managed to deflect.
Then a spinning strike, which I managed to parry and immediately counter with a sweeping horizontal strike aimed at her neck.
My mother taught me to strike decisively, without ceremony, so the techniques we practiced were very dangerous — something I’d already felt firsthand.
And again, a series of strikes, but instead of the sword, she used a leg sweep.
I managed to pull my leg away, but took the pommel of her sword to the chest and flew backward.
I didn’t even have time to swear; the air was simply knocked out of me.
Like, it was there, and then it wasn’t, and I was just gasping for breath.
“You okay?” she leaned over me.
“Still alive, cough-cough.” Placing her hand on my chest, she used Force healing to help me recover.
“You’re getting too distracted.
Don’t try to watch the sword; watch the space around you.
Your ability is your main asset, Shade.
Use it.” “I can’t keep up.
I can’t see it.” “That’s the problem.
Tomorrow, we’ll try to accelerate your mind so you can process incoming information fast enough.” “Uh-huh.” “And this is just a light Force amplification.
Can you imagine what a fight would be like if we were moving at full speed?” “I can imagine it.” “And by that point, you’ll be required to at least react to an attack like that and get out of the way, even if you can’t win.” “Huh?!” I stared wide-eyed.
“Yes, Shade.
That’s the only way I’ll be able to feel at ease about you.
Or have you already given up?” she smiled.
“No, I haven’t, cough-cough, given up!
I’m full of strength and energy.
Come on, get into your stance,” I jumped to my feet, though I started coughing again.
That last hit I took was a real doozy.
“A few more rounds, and that’s enough for today,” she said, ruffling my hair as she returned to her spot.
Damn…
I hope I live at least until I enter the temple.
* * * “Ther-ere you go.
Breathe deeply and calmly,” my mother said softly, sitting across from me.
I was learning to meditate.
Yes, as strange as it sounds, we were only just starting these lessons.
Honestly, my mother wasn’t very fond of it herself, but…
it was necessary.
The ability to abstract yourself and enter a meditative state opens up a lot of possibilities, so I had to suffer through it.
“Quit your squirming.” “I can’t,” I grumbled back, opening my eyes.
“My legs fell asleep.” Her hand instinctively went to her face.
“I told you to sit properly.” “But it’s uncomfortable!” “Get used to it.” “Why?” “Shade, you’re going to need this a lot in the future.” My expression spoke louder than words.
“Okay, fine.
Let me explain.” I nodded to show I was all ears.
“Through meditation, we open our boundaries.
In stillness, we see the future and create new devices.
Emotions aren’t needed here.” I tilted my head slightly and raised an eyebrow questioningly.
“Je’daii must be able to immerse themselves in both the light and the darkness.
Uval was right about that.” “Why?” “The dark side gives you strength to achieve your goals, but it also corrupts.
The light side, on the other hand, can paralyze active energy, for example, by bringing up painful memories.
To maintain balance, we must be able to use both sources of power, and meditation is the best way to access its light side.
Thankfully, you’ve already learned to control the dark.
You can control the light in principle too, but you still need to learn to meditate!” she added immediately: “Pro-o-o-perly meditate,” in such a tone of finality that I even shuddered.
“Mom…” “What’s on your mind now?” she asked with a smile.
Damn, how was I not driving her crazy?
Three tons of questions every day.
Anyone else would hang themselves, but she just keeps smiling and answering willingly.
“You misunderstood me.
Why do we immerse ourselves in the Force?” The question clearly threw her off.
Her eyes widened, and her breath caught.
“Um…
well, you see…
it’s just…” “Why?” “Otherwise, we can’t understand it,” she replied calmly, her positivity returning.
“You see, Shade, only with light can darkness exist, and only in darkness does light burn.
If we don’t immerse ourselves, we simply won’t be able to control it.
And without control, it will destroy us.
Wielding power is not just a gift, but also a curse that must be managed.
Otherwise…
it will consume us.” “But do we really need to immerse ourselves in it?” “What do you mean?” the Togruta opposite me asked with interest.
She looked like she’d just stepped out of her teenage years, though she had to be decades old.
That’s what the Force does!
“You said the Force is everywhere.
Around us, and inside us.
Especially inside us.
It gave us the chance to interact with it.
But by immersing ourselves in the dark or the light, we become slaves to one side or the other.
We lose ourselves.
Remember, you told me about Je’daii who fell to one side?
Those who were sent to Ashla or Bogan.
What led them to that?” I paused and looked at my mother.
She was listening attentively and not interrupting, so I continued.
“As far as I can tell, it was foolishness that led them there.
I think there’s no point in us immersing ourselves, because the power is already within us.
It’s already with us.
It supports us, in joy and in sorrow.
It helps us fight difficulties and gives us the ability to grow.
It’s part of us, and we’re part of it.
It’s not a curse or a gift; it just is.” “Just don’t say that at the temple,” she muttered quietly.
“Why?
Did I say something wrong?” “You just undermined our…” “I didn’t undermine anything,” yeah, not yet.
“I was just expressing my own theory that there’s no point in us deliberately working ourselves up.
Because what we’re trying to achieve is already with us; we just don’t understand it yet.
Or don’t realize it.” “Maybe you’re right,” came the unexpected reply, her voice thoughtful.
“As far as I know, the Order has never looked at it from that angle.
But what you said…
where do you even get these ideas?” “Because there still isn’t a single correct view of the Force.” “Instead of playing outside like all normal children, you sit around doing who knows what,” she feigned indignation.
“Just like your father in his time.” “But it’s interesting!” I cried out from the depths of my soul.
She laughed and, reaching out, pulled me close.
“Come here, my dark little siriss**” * * * “W-well…” I drawled, looking at my future classmates.
Even though we were almost eight, and some of them were already past that, every one of them looked like fifteen-year-old teenagers.
I spotted one Wookiee, a pair of Zabrak twins, two male Twi’leks and one female, a Mirialan, a group of seven boys and two girls of the human race, a pair of Sith, one Sallustan, and a Selkath.
Completing this motley crew was a pair consisting of a Miraluka and a Cathar.
The latter was a mix of cat and human.
But either she was a half-breed too, or I was mixing something up — unlike pure-blooded representatives, her face was definitely closer to human.
A small nose that was slightly flattened against her face, pointed ears on top of her head, little lips, short silky fur.
She had cat-like eyes, and long, flowing hair as silky as the fur, reaching down to her collarbone.
The girl barely stood a meter and a half tall.
I even froze for a moment, so captivating was this cat-girl.
It was like an anime fan’s dream come true, just begging to be cuddled.
Meanwhile, my stare had clearly been noticed.
Turning, this cute creature threw a glare full of anger in my direction and raised one eyebrow questioningly.
So cute!
“I’ve seen Cathar before, of course, but one like you — never,” I admitted honestly, continuing to brazenly examine this wonder of nature.
“Someone like you either,” she replied, her voice soft yet with a slight growl, twitching her ear a little.
“A half-breed?” I tilted my head slightly to the side.
“Yes.
What?
Got a problem?” she growled at me.
No, seriously, so cute, I could just melt into a puddle.
“No, quite the opposite.
You’re very pretty and incredibly cute.” Huh?!
What did I say that made half the crowd go silent and stare at me?
She herself was clearly thrown off.
Her fur bristled, her eyes and ears drooped, and her movements became awkward.
Turning away, she mumbled quietly: “Thanks.” “Ahem, ahem,” the one who seemed to be our Master drew our attention.
A yellow-skinned, stocky Zabrak in a robe, with a metal blade on his belt, involuntarily commanded respect.
Scanning our crowd, he smiled and spoke.
“So, younglings.
Welcome to Qigong Kesh.
The Temple of Force Understanding.
You made the right decision to begin your path here, for only by knowing the Force can you master it.
Unfortunately, many don’t understand this and start their path at Stav Kesh.
The Temple of Martial Arts.
But enough of that, let’s get acquainted.
My name is Master Garos.
I will be your instructor for the next year.
In Padawan Kesh, they taught you to read, write, and speak.
You also more or less figured out your abilities, learned to meditate, and feel the Force.
Now, you will undergo in-depth training in interacting with the Force.
I will teach you to anticipate a blow, to see without eyes, and to feel the world around you…” The crowd stared at the master with wide eyes and open mouths.
Interestingly, everything he listed I could already do.
My vision was layered with sensing the world around me, thanks to my different parents.
I’d learned to anticipate a blow very well — a thousand projectiles a day really helped with that.
The only thing I was struggling with was languages.
I only knew two, when the curriculum called for four.
Basic, Shyriiwook (the Wookiee language), my native tongue, and Tythonian.
I didn’t know the first two.
Well, I could manage Basic somewhat, since it’s meant for speaking with everyone.
“…there.
Now I’d like to hear your names.” The crowd snapped out of it instantly.
The twins spoke first.
“Zeng…” “And Feng!” “Bazex,” they introduced themselves.
“Gr-a-a-a…” Oh, I could tell I was going to have to learn Shyriiwook, I really was.
Or…
“Look at the Wookiee” …he would teach me.
“Uh-huh,” the master nodded and looked at the humans.
Interestingly, the human group kept to themselves, apart from the others.
Only one of the seven boys stood and freely (before the master’s arrival) talked with the Miraluka.
“Ramira Urana,” the Zabrak girl introduced herself somewhat shyly, after the human group.
She looked like an ordinary…
almost ordinary Zabrak.
Gray skin, and the same color hair with white horns sticking out of it.
Should I dye them red or something?
That would be cool.
But I was wondering, why is it that in their species, females have hair while males don’t?
Nature’s joke?
Meanwhile, the introductions continued.
The kids called out their names until it was my turn.
“Shade Aero.” Upon hearing me, the Zabrak smirked, and that reaction intrigued me.
“Something wrong?” “Your name.
It suits you.
Willful, decisive, inquisitive.
Just like your mother.
A dangerous cocktail, very dangerous.
I’ve seen your kind before, with that same look.
They caused a lot of trouble.” “I can reassure you — there won’t be any less with me,” I said with a smile.
He just grunted and looked at the Miraluka.
Yes, I knew that these words from a teenager sounded more like…
like…
I don’t know what, but I already didn’t like this guy.
And if I didn’t like him, then to hell with him and my respect.
“Lina Sau,” the Miraluka introduced herself.
“Vessira Rova,” the Cathar smiled.
“Well, that’s good.
I ask you to split into pairs and form a single column.” The kids immediately started dividing up and looking for partners, while he watched it all attentively and…
drew conclusions?
Damn, who had they stuck us with that he was already analyzing children right off the bat?
On the other hand, he was doing the right thing.
“Can I pair up with…” I didn’t get to finish before Vessira simply twitched her ear and stepped over to pair up with the Wookiee.
Damn.
What did I do wrong?
We were talking fine!
Though, who the hell knows with these women…
no, even the demons wouldn’t understand — they had their own women.
Turning around, I bumped into Ramira, who was fidgeting.
Seeing that no one was really asking to pair with her, I just walked up silently.
“Want to keep me company?” “What?
N-no.” Damn, she was so shy.
But you know what?
A shy Zabrak was powerful.
A minute later “So.
Now we’ll head through the temple of Qigong Kesh.
Please don’t fall behind — it’s very easy to get lost in here.” Turning, the Zabrak led us onward.
“What are we going to study?” one of the twins couldn’t hold back.
“You’ll find out.” “Will you teach us to fight?” Vaal inquired.
“We all know how to fight already,” I muttered quietly, but noticed half of the aliens around me turn my way.
Unfortunately, the master was no exception.
“So you know how to fight?” he asked, though there was something else hidden in his voice.
I couldn’t tell what it was, but I answered the question.
“We all know how to scrap.
We don’t know how to fight.” The master smiled and turned, leading our column toward the temple entrance.
“What’s the difference?” asked one of the Twi’leks walking in front of me.
“Scrapping is just stupidly flailing your arms and legs.
Fighting is a battle where you use tactics, skill, strength.
Fighting…
is an art.” “And how do you know that?” his neighbor asked.
“I read it in a book.” “Wait,” one of the Zabrak twins suddenly spoke up, walking ahead of the Twi’leks.
“You’re that half-breed who was always following his mom around!” the second added.
The first snickers sounded.
“Yeah.
That’s definitely you.
You were supposed to join our group, but you stayed home.
Mama’s boy, huh?” The Master, who had been walking silently, looked back with interest.
“So what are you going to do now?” “Her back isn’t around anymore.
What am I going to do?
Well, I’ll—” “U-u-ura-a-ay.
Ma-ari-i-u-u.” A stunned silence.
The Wookiee intervened before I could, saving the insolent ones from injury — I was just about to dole out some good and dispense justice.
“What did he say?” one of the Zabraks asked.
Strangely enough, my neighbor answered.
“He said that in your place, he wouldn’t mess with Shade.” The twins exchanged glances and laughed.
“Gr-u-u-ar ar-r-r-ru ru ra-ra-r.” After that tirade, I noticed the silently walking Master smile at the corners of his lips.
Glancing back at the Wookiee, I saw his neighbor also smiling slightly, looking off to the side.
But the Miraluka…
Lina, I think, was smiling quite openly.
Looking at Ramira, I realized the Wookiee had said something that lifted the spirits of everyone who understood him.
“So what did that fur coat say now?” one of the Humans exclaimed.
“He said you’ve really stepped in it.” The people exchanged glances and laughed.
I quietly asked: “What did he say?” “In short: his family knows your mother by face.
He also said he’s seen your training sessions with your mother a couple of times.” I turned to the Wookiee and saw that smug face winking at me, grinning from ear to ear.
“I don’t know what kind of training that was, but he clearly thinks highly of you,” she added.
Yeah.
I hadn’t even started and I was already in trouble.
And Wookiee respect isn’t given lightly — that’s a fact.
Meanwhile, Master Garos led us through wide corridors with high ceilings.
Monolithic columns supported the arches, and various symbols were carved into the columns themselves.
On the walls, different paintings from ancient times adorned.
Interestingly, the light didn’t come from lamps but from fixed-location clots of the Force.
Amazing, right?
“Holy…” escaped my lips in pure Russian as we entered a corridor whose windows overlooked an inner courtyard.
In the courtyard, a group of about twenty Je’daii was training.
Notably, they were alternately extinguishing each other with small lightning discharges.
While one person attacked, another would take the hit on some kind of Force shield or deflect it.
Another group, also about twenty, was working with earth.
In mere seconds, each of them raised piles of earth, forming three-dimensional shapes.
And I’m not even mentioning an incomprehensible storm about five meters in diameter!
“Padawans learning to work with the Force,” our guide said proudly.
Leading us to the end of the corridor, I suddenly noticed with my Force sight a person standing slightly to the side.
He was studying our group, not moving.
Oh!
He noticed my gaze — how he flared with surprise.
“Hello,” I greeted this “ghost” as I passed.
“What-what?” the Master asked, turning around.
Didn’t get it?!
Am I the only one who saw him?
“There…
standing here…” I turned to that spot but saw no one.
“…a man was standing.” Turning to the Master, I saw his quizzically raised eyebrow.
“Honestly, he was standing!
Wearing a long cloak.” The Master gave a skeptical look but said nothing and led the group on.
What the hell?!
Explanation: * Only after my death.
A bird that lives on Tython.
A small black feathered creature the size of a swallow.
Its distinguishing feature is that the bird cannot be seen in the Force.
It all helps promote the story.