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System Are You Kidding Me

Chapter 2 / 80

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Chapter 2 of 80

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Chapter 2: SPARK OF THE WAR DRUM

System Are You Kidding Me

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The night faded, and dawn broke over the city.

“System, are they meeting right now?” Jiang WuShang asked.

**Ding!** ————-System ————— Host, they will be meeting in half an hour.Full novel: System Are You Kidding Me — read the rest free on N​o⁠v​e⁠l​C⁠o​d⁠e​x⁠.​o⁠r​g⁠

———————————— “Perfect,” Jiang WuShang murmured.

“Then I can head to the Magistrate’s Office now.” He stepped out of his home and began walking through the winding streets.

The city wasn’t large — just a remote corner of the Mortal Realm — and all matters were under the authority of Magistrate Ling.

No one dared oppose him, not even when he committed wrongs.

As he walked, a sign caught his eye.

**NIGHT ROSE BROTHEL** Jiang WuShang’s expression shifted instantly.

“In my past life, I did have a girlfriend — but I died a virgin.

What a perfect place to lose my first touch.

And prostitution is legal here?” A faint smile tugged at his lips.

“I’m starting to like this world.” He pushed open the door and stepped inside.

The brothel was bustling — beautiful women with long legs and delicate features everywhere.

The scent of incense and jasmine filled the air.

Their grace and charm stirred something deep within him.

His mouth watered.

“What a paradise.” But then, a cold reality struck him.

“I’m broke.

I can’t afford even a low-level beauty.” He sighed, the sound barely audible.

“I can’t let my mood drop — or I’ll die.” He found a table near the corner and sat down.

“Waiter,” he said to the one standing nearby, “get me the cheapest wine.” “Of course,” the man replied with a practiced, polite smile, before turning to walk away.

“Hey,” Jiang WuShang said, leaning forward, “ten strings of bronze coins still count, right?” “Of course,” another waiter replied, stepping forward with a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes.

“What a broke man,” a woman waiting for customers muttered under her breath.

Soon, the first waiter returned with a jar of thin, cloudy wine.

“Here, sir.

Your wine,” he said, offering it with another fake smile.

He turned and walked away.

“Hey — where are you going?” Jiang WuShang smiled.

“Come sit with me.

I’ve got some news.” The man stopped, turned, and looked back.

“I’m not worthy, sir.” Disdain flickered across his face.

“Sit down.

I promise you won’t regret it.” Jiang WuShang nodded.

“Who knows?

This might even earn you a reward.” “Alright,” the waiter said, eyes narrowing slightly.

“I’ll sit.” He picked up the wine and poured a small amount for both of them.

Jiang WuShang leaned in, lowering his voice.

“Do you know how old Magistrate Ling’s father is?” “He’s ninety this year,” the waiter replied.

“What about that?

Did he pass away?” “Yeah,” Jiang WuShang said, sipping his wine.

” But he didn’t.” The waiter blinked.

“He got married again”, said Jiang WuShang.

The man’s eyes widened with sudden excitement.

“He did?” “Keep your voice down,” Jiang WuShang whispered.

“You know how far Magistrate Ling’s influence stretches.” “Understood,” the waiter murmured, instantly lowering his tone.

Jiang WuShang smiled.

“So, how old is Senior Ling’s bride?” “I don’t know.

Maybe forty or fifty?” The waiter thought for a moment.

“She can’t be younger than that.” “No,” Jiang WuShang shook his head.

“She’s eighteen.” The waiter froze.

“Do you really mean to say Magistrate Ling’s stepmother is only eighteen?” Jiang WuShang stared into his cup, a somber expression on his face.

“What?!

No way!” The waiter’s eyes widened.

“A ninety-year-old man marrying an eighteen-year-old girl?

That’s like marrying a granddaughter!” He lifted his cup and took a long, slow drink.

“Buddy,” he said, voice barely above a whisper, “don’t tell anyone about this.” Jiang WuShang stood up.

“At least — not for free.” “Right,” the waiter nodded, smiling.

“And thanks for the tip.

This will be today’s hottest news.

If I get any rewards from it, I won’t forget you.

It’s been a while since I heard such a story.” Jiang WuShang paused.

“There’s one more thing I need to share.” He gave the waiter a warm, brotherly look.

“You’re like a brother to me — so I’ll tell you.” “Brother, tell me!” The waiter’s eyes lit up.

“Do you know those two men who always hang around Magistrate Ling?” Jiang WuShang nodded.

“Yes.

I know them.” The waiter nodded in return.

“No matter what they do, Magistrate Ling never punishes them.

They even claim to be his sworn brothers.” “Yes,” Jiang WuShang said, lowering his voice.

“They kidnapped someone important to Magistrate Ling and are blackmailing him — forcing him to do whatever they want.” “What?” the waiter gasped.

“They’re blackmailing him?” He frowned.

“I thought Magistrate Ling was just a corrupt official.” “I’m on my way to the Magistrate’s Office,” Jiang WuShang said, standing.

“See you later.” “And you know what to do, right?” he added.

“Come often, brother.” The waiter cupped his hands.

“And don’t worry — I’m with you.” Jiang WuShang walked out of the brothel.

The waiter watched him go, tears forming in his eyes.

“What a kind young man.” He clenched his fists.

“He’s going to the Magistrate’s Office to save Magistrate Ling.” “No!

I must spread this news.

I must save him!” With that, he hurried away, racing through the streets to find others and share the truth.

**Ding!** ————-System ————— Host, I think I don’t have any memory of Magistrate Ling having an eighteen-year-old stepmother.

———————————– “You’re wrong,” Jiang WuShang smiled, voice calm and smug.

“Magistrate Ling doesn’t have a stepmother — at all.” ————-System ————— Host is good at playing his cards.

———————————– “System,” Jiang WuShang said, frowning, “I’ve changed that waiter’s mood so many times — why didn’t I get any Emotion Points?” ————-System ————— Host, that waiter is not a cultivator.

Only cultivators can generate Emotion Points for you.

———————————– “Ah,” Jiang WuShang nodded.

“I understand now.” He turned and continued walking toward the Magistrate’s Office.

Soon, he reached the area near the office.

Two guards stood at the entrance.

And outside, two men knelt on the ground — one in a tattered robe, the other with a heavy, weathered look.

Curious, Jiang WuShang approached a nearby onlooker.

“Hey, friend,” he said, “what’s going on?

Who are those two men?” “Oh, those two?” the man pointed.

“They came to complain about someone’s wrongdoing — but Magistrate Ling didn’t listen.

He didn’t punish them at all.” He lowered his voice.

“He’s taking money from them to cover up crimes.” “Oh,” Jiang WuShang nodded.

“I see.” He walked toward the office.

When he reached the door, the guards stepped in front of him.

“Stop!” one of them snapped.

“No one enters without authorization.” “I’m here to meet Magistrate Ling,” Jiang WuShang said.

“It’s urgent — it’s about Senior Ling.” The guard frowned.

“If you delay, we could both be punished by Magistrate Ling.”, added Jiang WuShang.

Jiang WuShang stepped forward.

“If I don’t meet him, who knows what will happen to him?” “Are you telling the truth?” The guard studied him.

“Yes,” Jiang WuShang said, voice steady.

“It’s urgent.” He nodded.

“If I don’t report this, we’ll both be held accountable.” “Can you bear the consequences?” The guard hesitated.

“Fine,” he said finally.

“Go in.” He stepped aside.

“But if anything goes wrong — I’m not responsible.” “Thank you,” Jiang WuShang said, smiling.

“If I get any reward, I won’t forget you.” He stepped inside.

Inside, he saw an old man seated on a wooden chair, writing in a scroll.

He looked to be around sixty — sharp eyes, a calm expression, but with a quiet authority.

“Who… who is there?” the man asked, eyes lifting slowly.

“I greet Magistrate Ling,” Jiang WuShang said, hands cupped together.

“Boy,” the old man said, narrowing his gaze.

“Who are you?” “My name is Jiang WuShang,” he replied, lowering his head.

“I’m here to report something — please, Magistrate Ling, hear the voice of the people.” “You’re here to report someone?” the old man asked.

“Exactly,” Jiang WuShang said, voice trembling slightly.

“My father died.

Soon after, two men broke into my home and demanded money — I’m powerless, sir.

Please help me.” “Oh?” the old man looked up, intrigued.

“Are you talking about these two?” **Clap!** The sound echoed through the room.

Two men entered from a side chamber — one tall, one lean, both with cold expressions.

“Oh my,” one laughed, eyes gleaming.

“This is second time today someone has complained about us.” “Yes,” Jiang WuShang said, pointing.

“They’re the ones demanding money from me.” “Boy,” Magistrate Ling said, smiling, “you’re talking about Wu Nan?” “He is my sworn brother,” Magistrate Ling said, voice calm.

“How could I punish one of my own sworn brothers?” “Brat,” Wu Nan laughed, “we gave you a week.” “But you were in such a hurry to die,” he added with a smirk.

Jiang WuShang looked at the old man.

“Are you certain, Magistrate Ling?

You won’t take any action?” “I won’t,” Magistrate Ling said, eyes glinting with amusement.

“What are you going to do about it, brat?” “Very well,” Jiang WuShang said, smiling.

He reached for a drumstick — the kind used in ancient ceremonies.

“Boy,” Magistrate Ling said, raising a brow, “what are you doing?” “Are you going to play music to entertain us?” Jiang WuShang didn’t answer right away.

‘Thanks to the memories of the previous host, I know what to do.’ He looked at the drum.

“Do you know what a war drum means?” He raised the drumstick.

And began to beat.

**Dum… dum-dum… dum… dum-dum…** The rhythm grew stronger, deeper, more urgent.

Magistrate Ling’s face instantly changed.

“That tune…” His eyes widened.

“It’s a war drum tune!” “Stop him!” he shouted.

But it was too late.

The sound spread through the courtyard.

One person stepped forward.

Then another.

Soon, the streets were filled with people — the crowd grew rapidly.

Within moments, nearly **three thousand** had gathered inside the office.

Jiang WuShang looked at the sea of faces.

A slow, confident smile spread across his face.

The show had just begun.

Remember, we are releasing 5 chapters today to kick off the launch, so keep swiping for the next chapter!

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Full novel: System Are You Kidding Me — read the rest free on N​o⁠v​e⁠l​C⁠o​d⁠e​x⁠.​o⁠r​g⁠
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