Сhаpter 13: Вrother Ваhun Switсhеs tо а Smurf Aссоunt Тoo
Тhe barrage instаntlу eruрtеd:
【Ноlу shit holу shit hоlу shit! Streamеr, I sаlute уou as a rеal mаn, this is just too damn сaрriciоus!】
【Тhe streаmer is reallу brаvе, kiсking out a lеvеl 74 big brоthеr just like that is tоo аwesomе!】
【The strеamer is tоo arrogаnt, оffеnding quite а fеw big brothers in just two dаys. Fееls like troublе is bound to hаpреn sоonеr or latеr!】
【Let’s bet оn it, will thе strеamer’s account get bannеd within а month?】
【Quick, follow hеr! I wаnt to see if thе strеamer’s account gets banned!】
Song Jingwu took a sip of Shuangwaiwai to calm her nerves, then said with a smile, “Oh, who said he was my big brother? Now that I’ve kicked him out, you can pick him up.”
“You…”
Feng Xiaoxue widened her eyes in disbelief. She had never seen a female streamer so brazenly kick a big brother out of her livestream, especially a whale who was about to reach max level!
“Fine, you’re ruthless.”
Feng Xiaoxue directly disconnected the call and ran to send a private message to Brother Bahun: 【Brother Bahun, come to my livestream. That woman is clearly crazy. Let’s ignore her.】
However, Brother Bahun was in no mood to check his private messages. He was so angry he was practically smoking, feeling like his whole body was about to catch fire.
Ahhhhhhhhhh! I’m really going crazy!
Where did he offend her? Why did she treat him like this?!
So, he secretly switched to a smurf account—not a brand-new one, but one he had logged into a few times before, already at level 40—and re-entered the livestream.
【User “Divorced 77 Times” has entered the livestream】
He originally wanted to confront her right away, but after thinking about it, he decided to test the waters by sending a gift first.
【User “Divorced 77 Times” sent Porsche*1】（1200 Tomato）
Afraid the streamer wouldn’t notice, he sent another one.
【User “Divorced 77 Times” sent Porsche*1】
This time, Song Jingwu finally sent him a heart gesture: “Thank you, Brother Divorced 77 Times, for the Porsche. Much appreciated!”
Brother Bahun was stunned for a moment, then all his anger and frustration instantly dissipated. It felt like spring had arrived, and he couldn’t help but smile, his mood inexplicably lifting!
Hmph, this woman finally thanked him and sent him a heart!
【User “Divorced 77 Times” sent Carnival*1】（30000 Tomato）
【User “Divorced 77 Times” sent Romantic Carriage*1】（28888 Tomato）
【User “Divorced 77 Times” sent Big Rocket*1】（10000 Tomato）
【User “Divorced 77 Times” sent Mysterious Garden*1】（3999 Tomato）
…
【Yan Yan’er: Wow~ Another big brother has arrived. Thank you, Brother 77, for the gifts! Brother 77 is awesome!】
【Little Star: Brother Divorced 77 Times, follow and join the fan club so you don’t get lost~】
【One Promise Worth a Thousand Gold: Brother Divorce is generous! Handsome boss!】
Song Jingwu hurriedly said, “Enough, enough, Brother Divorce. You’ve been divorced so many times, you must have a lot of kids at home. Save some money to buy them food!”
【Divorced 77 Times: …I’m still a virgin, damn it!】
Song Jingwu looked surprised: “You’ve been married 77 times and you’re still a virgin? Brother Divorce, you’re not doing so well.”
【Divorced 77 Times: …I’m only in my twenties, thank you.】The point is, he’s still so young—how could he possibly have really been divorced 77 times? Damn it, he’s not some stud! Besides, he may seem wild and unrestrained, but in reality, he hasn’t even held a woman’s hand yet!
Song Jingwu was even more astonished: “Oh my gosh, you’re already ‘not up to it’ in your twenties? If you need help, I can actually prepare a medicine for you—you know what it does~”
The comments section was dying of laughter:
[Hahahahaha, this isn’t a serious livestream, but I’m trash and I love hearing this stuff, hehe~]
[It’s over, now the entire platform is going to know Divorced Brother is ‘not up to it’!]
[The streamer has managed to offend Divorced Brother all on her own again.]
But the next second, everyone watched as “Divorced 77 Times” changed his ID to “Super Fierce Man” hahahahahahaha.
[Super Fierce Man: …How about now? I’ve got an eight-pack! I’m 185 cm tall.]
Song Jingwu played along perfectly: “You’re fierce, you’re fierce, you’re fierce—so fierce I almost took a dive just looking at you.”
[333: Passing by at 188 cm.]
[Yan Yan’er: Wow~ Fierce Man Brother and Third Brother are both super tall, long-legged male gods!]
[333: He’s a male god… of nerves.]
[Super Fierce Man: …Third Brother, why are you spouting such honest truths?]
[Hahahahahahahaha, I can’t stop laughing.]
Little Rabbit Xun: “Hahaha, Wuwu, your livestream is so fun. How about I invite someone else in? It’s more fun playing games with four people.”
“Sure.” Song Jingwu was more than happy to agree.
This time, it was a male streamer who joined. He looked quite delicate and refined, probably a chat and entertainment streamer, named “Adi.”
Little Rabbit Xun: “How about each of us says something we’ve done or have that the others haven’t done or don’t have? If someone else has done it or has it too, that means they fail and have to accept a punishment—how about 30 squats?”
“OK, OK.” Song Jingwu raised her hand in agreement. This was exactly the kind of game she loved playing.
Everyone else also agreed.
[Oww oww oww, I’ve played this game with my classmates, but we used finger-bending—if all five fingers were bent down, you lost.]
[With Sister Wu’s way of thinking, she’s definitely going to surprise us. I’m really looking forward to it.]
“Then who should start first?” Sister Lingdang asked.
“I’ll go first.”
Little Rabbit Xun racked her brains, and her eyes suddenly lit up. She said, “When I was little, I had a crush on the neighbor’s brother who was two years older than me. In the middle of winter, I put on a pink princess dress, grabbed a pull-tab ring, and ran over to propose to him. In the end, my mom chased me with a feather duster and beat me!”
[Hahahahahaha, to be honest, I’ve done something like this too, but I was chased and beaten by the guy himself!]
[When I was little, I used a grass-woven ring to play house, and there was a proposal scene in it!]
[Little Rabbit Xun is so adorable. I’m a fan now, a fan!]
Sister Lingdang quietly raised her hand and spoke up: “I’ve had a similar experience, but I thought the guy was going to propose to me. It was so annoying.”
“Tell us, tell us.” Song Jingwu loved gossip the most, and her ears perked up.
Sister Lingdang: “I clearly saw him holding a pull-tab ring, and he even knelt down on one knee in front of me. You have no idea how excited I was at the time. I thought, ‘A pull-tab ring is fine—if he dares to propose, I’ll dare to say yes.’ But guess what happened?”Little Rabbit Xun guessed, “Could it be that he suddenly let out a fart?”
Adi guessed, “Actually, was it just that his leg went numb and he couldn’t get up?”
Song Jingwu stroked his chin, pondered hard for a moment, and slowly said, “I guess the man’s pants zipper was open, so he came up with a plan. He immediately knelt on one knee, secretly pulled up the zipper, quickly stood up, and pretended nothing happened.”
[Hahahahahaha, actually, just pulling up a pants zipper really doesn’t have to be this troublesome!]
[Anchor, are you trying to make me laugh to death so you can inherit my family’s century-old pig farm!]
[Yan Yan’er: My hubby’s thought process is a bit unusual, everyone please bear with him~]
[Super Fierce Man: Hahaha, I can’t believe you came up with that.]
[333 (smoking): It’s not impossible.]