After Prime Minister Su passed out, absolute chaos descended upon the inner courtyard of the Su Estate.
Servants scrambled to pinch his philtrum and pour cold water down his throat, while Su Hua wept by his side as though her birth father were already dead—though he was certainly getting close. Meanwhile, Lady Liu, the instigator of this grand spectacle, had just groggily regained consciousness and was preparing to slip out through the back door amidst the confusion to find her Squire Wang.
Yet the moment she scrambled to her feet, a pair of black court boots embroidered with gold thread stopped directly before her.
Looking up along the boots, she met the frost-cold face of the Regent, alongside Su Tang’s harmless, beaming smile.
“M-Mother, where are you off to?” Su Tang squatted down, asking with a sweet smile. “Father just fainted. Instead of staying to nurse him, could you be thinking of… going treasure hunting?”
Lady Liu’s heart skipped a beat, her eyes darting nervously. “N-Nonsense! I’m going to fetch a doctor for Master!”
Fetch a doctor? More like transferring your assets!
Su Tang scoffed inwardly.
Tongzi, activate radar scan! Since this old witch managed to embezzle one hundred thousand taels, she must have more secret treasures tucked away! Even a crafty rabbit keeps three burrows!
System: Ding! Scan successful! Wise host! There is indeed a high-energy signature beneath the floorboards of Lady Liu’s bedroom! That’s the ‘retirement fund’ she has amassed over the past dozen years through usury, skimming from the public accounts, and fencing imperial gifts! It’s all hard currency—large gold ingots!
Su Tang: Holy crap! Gold ingots? Quick, quick, quick! What are the coordinates?
System: The coordinates are… well, a bit awkward. In the northwest corner of Lady Liu’s bedroom, under that carved rosewood stand…
Su Tang: The rosewood stand? What’s placed on that? Antiques? Vases?
System: No, it’s for holding the commode.
Pfft—
Su Tang nearly choked on her own saliva.
The commode?!
Are you telling me she hid gold ingots under a chamber pot?!
Brilliant! Absolutely brilliant! Is this the ultimate realm of ‘treating money like filth’? Sitting on a mountain of gold to defecate every single day—this old witch really knows how to enjoy herself!
Standing to the side, a crack finally appeared on Lu Ci’s cold, stern countenance.
A commode?[1]a commode is a low, ornate chest of drawers, cabinet, or a movable washstand built to hold a basin or conceal a chamber pot jQuery('#footnote_plugin_tooltip_3682985_1_1').tooltip({ tip: '#footnote_plugin_tooltip_text_3682985_1_1', tipClass: 'footnote_tooltip', effect: 'fade', predelay: 0, fadeInSpeed: 200, delay: 400, fadeOutSpeed: 200, position: 'top center', relative: true, offset: [-7, 0], });
Gold ingots?
The way he looked at Lady Liu instantly turned bizarre. Did everyone in the Su family have a malfunction in their brain?
“Since Mother is going to fetch a doctor, we won’t bother you with the trouble.” Su Tang stood up and clapped her hands. “Someone come and ‘escort’ Mother back to her room to rest. Furthermore…”
She turned to Lu Ci, her eyes sparkling. “Your Highness, I hear the feng shui in Mother’s room is exceptional—especially the northwest corner, a truly auspicious spot for gathering wealth. Shall we pay it a visit?”
The corner of Lu Ci’s mouth twitched subtly.
Visit where? Visit a commode?
Yet looking at Su Tang’s money-grubber expression, he somehow found himself nodding. “Granted.”
…
Inside Lady Liu’s bedroom, a faint scent of sandalwood mingled with a certain indescribable odor.
The moment Su Tang stepped through the door, she headed straight for the northwest corner.
Sure enough, a finely carved rosewood stand sat there, bearing a night stool adorned with gold inlay.
Dragged into the room by guards, Lady Liu saw Su Tang standing before her “treasured spot.” Her soul nearly departed her body in terror. Rushing forward like mad, she screamed, “Don’t touch it! That’s mine… my commode! You bandits! Are you going to rob me of a commode too?!”
“Mother, you treat me like a stranger.” Su Tang took a step back, covering her nose. “Am I the kind of person who steals chamber pots? What I have my eye on is what’s underneath the pot.”
She turned to Lu Ci, blinking furiously.
Your Highness! Go for it! Right here! Smash open the floorboards—there’s gold all underneath! My military funds! My hot pot! My retirement money!
Lu Ci took a deep breath, feeling his dignity as the Regent severely challenged.
Ordering his men to dig up a commode?
If word of this got out, how could he maintain his standing in the imperial court?
Yet looking at the expectant gleam in Su Tang’s eyes, Lu Ci ultimately compromised. He raised a hand to pinch the bridge of his nose and gestured toward the shadow guards behind him.
“Dig.”
His voice was concise and firm, yet steeped in sheer resignation.
The shadow guards exchanged looks. Though internally collapsing, the Regent’s command was absolute.
Two shadow guards stepped forward, holding their breath as they shoved the commode aside, drew their sidearms, and began prying at the floor tiles.
Crack—
The floor tiles were pried open, revealing a pitch-black cavity below.
Immediately afterward, a dazzling golden glare burst from the hole, nearly blinding everyone present.
“We hit paydirt!”[2]originates from 19th-century gold mining, referring to soil, gravel, or rock that contains a profitable amount of valuable minerals or gold jQuery('#footnote_plugin_tooltip_3682985_1_2').tooltip({ tip: '#footnote_plugin_tooltip_text_3682985_1_2', tipClass: 'footnote_tooltip', effect: 'fade', predelay: 0, fadeInSpeed: 200, delay: 400, fadeOutSpeed: 200, position: 'top center', relative: true, offset: [-7, 0], });
A shadow guard exclaimed, hauling out five heavy wooden chests from within.
Opening them up, they revealed neatly stacked gold ingots!
Whoa!!!
Su Tang’s internal scream nearly blew off the roof.
I’m rich, I’m rich! Each chest has at least a thousand taels of gold! Five chests mean five thousand taels! Converted to silver, that’s fifty thousand taels! Plus the previous one hundred thousand… Oh my goodness, Prime Minister Su’s green hat was well worth wearing!
Looking at the chests full of gold ingots, a flicker of surprise passed through Lu Ci’s eyes as well.
How could a mere stepmother of the Su family embezzle so much money? It seemed the Su Estate had long been hollowed out from within.
“No!!! That’s my money! That’s my life!”
Seeing the gold ingots dug out, Lady Liu let out a blood-curdling screech, rolled her eyes, and fainted dead away for real this time.
Just then, hurried gasps for air sounded from the doorway.
Prime Minister Su, who had just come to after fainting, stumbled inside with Su Hua’s support.
The moment he entered, he saw those five chests of gleaming gold and… the commode that had been pushed aside.
“Th-This is…” Prime Minister Su pointed at the gold ingots, his fingers trembling.
Su Tang very thoughtfully walked over, explaining with a sweet smile, “Father, you’ve awakened just in time! This is the secret stash Mother hid under her commode, said to be the ‘dowry’ prepared for Merchant Wang. I thought that since this money belongs to the Su family after all, we couldn’t let an outsider profit from it, so I helped you find it.”
“Under the commode?” Prime Minister Su stared at the chests of gold ingots, picturing Lady Liu sitting atop it every day…
Urgh—
His stomach churned violently.
“Vermin! A family disgrace! An absolute disgrace to our lineage!” Prime Minister Su beat his chest and stomped his feet. Failing to catch his breath, his face instantly flushed the color of pig’s liver.
“Don’t be in a rush to faint, Father,” Su Tang added, striking while the iron was hot. “The shadow guards checked just now. These gold ingots all bear official treasury marks, and a portion of them belonged to the dowry imperially bestowed upon my mother. Lady Liu not only committed adultery, but also stole money, even melting down and remolding imperial gifts… That is a grave offense.”
Prime Minister Su swayed, collapsing completely onto the floor.
It was over.
The Su family was ruined.
Lu Ci looked coldly upon the disgraced state of the family, raising his hand with a wave. “Confiscate everything and take them away.”
“Yes!”
The shadow guards moved nimbly to carry the chests, casually kicking the commode aside in the process.
Su Tang followed behind Lu Ci cheerfully, in such a good mood she wanted to hum a tune.
Today is a good day~ Everything you wish for will come true~
Now that the Su family has been emptied out, that green tea bitch Su Hua won’t even be able to afford rouge or powder anymore—let’s see how she seduces the Crown Prince now! This total wipeout is absolute perfection!
Listening to her wildly off-key song inside her mind, Lu Ci shook his head helplessly.
Grabbing Su Tang’s hand, he pulled her into the carriage.
“Done making a scene?”
Su Tang immediately sat up properly and obediently. “Done, totally done. Thank you for backing me up, Your Highness.”
Looking at her bright, sparkling eyes, Lu Ci suddenly leaned forward, trapping her against the corner of the carriage.
“Since you’re done making a scene, it’s time to get down to business.”
Su Tang froze. “W-What business?”
No way? Pay with my body right after making money? This carriage isn’t that spacious… And isn’t he impotent? Could he be wanting to try some new tricks?
Lu Ci gritted his teeth, reaching out to flick her forehead hard.
“What are you thinking!”
“This Prince means that the army marches tomorrow. Since you love money so much, once we reach the border… you will manage the accounts for the grain and supplies.”
Holding her forehead, Su Tang’s eyes lit up once more.
Manage the accounts? That means holding the purse strings?!
Holy crap! I just got promoted to CFO!
Lu Ci, I declare that from this day forth, you are my sworn brother from another mother!
Lu Ci: “…”
Sworn brother?
Very well.
Once they reached the border, he would surely let her know the true meaning of “brotherly affection.”
The carriage clattered along, heading toward the camp outside the city.
Behind them, the once-illustrious Prime Minister’s Estate was left with nothing but a complete mess, and two ruined souls weeping in each other’s arms.
References[+]