But soon, Jiang Qiyu couldn’t laugh anymore.
Because after she finished dancing that provocative thug dance, the poison circle had completely spread over.
Watching her health bar dropping rapidly, she shouted “My life is over!” while taking meds, grabbed a vehicle, and chased after her teammates like crazy.
Just as she was about to reach her teammates’ coordinates, she suddenly heard Fang Xubai, sitting beside her, speak in a low voice:
“Teacher Changmao, can I ask you a question?”
Jiang Qiyu, while driving, spared a moment to reply dismissively:
“Shoot.”
“The AK47 has a range of 400 meters. If I stand 401 meters away, can I catch the bullet with my bare hands?”
“……” She almost crashed the car, glancing at the person with a serious expression before saying:
“Wait until I get there, and I’ll test it on you.”
“……”
Fang Xubai fell silent for two seconds before putting down his phone:
“Never mind, I just tried it. I’m already lying down.”
Jiang Qiyu arrived just before Fang Xubai was finished off by the opponent, but it was still too late. All she could hear was his “last words”:
“Teacher Changmao, you’re here. Well, I’ll hang up now.”
“Go in peace.”
Without hesitation, she silently mourned her teammate for half a second in her heart, then picked up the same AK47 to avenge him. After that, she looted two boxes without any psychological burden.
Over there, Qi Yu quickly dealt with his opponent, while Jiang Mian, who had been following her nearby, truly lived up to what Fang Xubai had said earlier—she almost made it to the final circle.
“Comrades, your super criminal is back!!”
With her pockets full, Jiang Qiyu cheerfully circled to the other side of the building to regroup with the two of them, only to see Jiang Mian riding a motorcycle parked in front of Qi Yu.
“Brother Yu, I found a vehicle. Get on quickly!”
“……”
The three of them stared at each other, and the situation suddenly became inexplicably awkward.
In this game, a motorcycle can only carry two people at most.
But now, especially since this is a dating show, whether Qi Yu should get on the motorcycle, leaving Jiang Qiyu behind to become a pair of fugitive lovers with Jiang Mian, became a delightful source of drama for the audience.
【Yu-Mian shippers are ecstatic!】
【Teacher Changmao: Should I leave?】
【Bai Bai has fallen in battle, and Teacher Changmao has lost her home, wuwuwuwu…】
【A thousand punishments await you, but don’t kill me with the Bai-Mao knife.】
【What are you all talking about? Brother Ear Slap might not even get on the motorcycle. I’m holding the banner for Long Ears!】
【……】
Just as the fans of the three CPs were fighting over whether Qi Yu would get on the motorcycle, Jiang Qiyu interrupted this conflict without gunpowder.
Because the one with gunpowder had arrived.
Everyone saw Jiang Qiyu’s game screen shift its view, and then a small, cute, oval-shaped object grew larger and larger in the frame…
It was a grenade!
“Run!!”
“Boom—”
Good news: no need to worry about whether Qi Yu would get on Jiang Mian’s motorcycle anymore.
Bad news: they were all wiped out.
Jiang Mian put down her phone and looked at Qi Yu, smiling regretfully:
“What a pity. We died together.”
Qi Yu ignored her and instead turned to look at the person beside him, who was secretly seething with anger. He narrowed his eyes dangerously:
“So it was you who led them here, wasn’t it?”
With just that one line, the barrage of comments that had been filled with lamentation was instantly amused, and netizens quickly joined in the fun:
【Whose father, whose husband, and whose son is this? The adult world is never easy. I salute you, a man as strong as steel!】
【Hahahaha, so you’re the one who led the enemy troops here, huh?】
【Jiang Qiyu, you should go abroad and lay low for a while. This is no small matter.】
【I hope the government sets up a special task force. This is serious, I’m not joking.】
Faced with his accusation, Jiang Qiyu turned off her screen, gritting her teeth:
“There are two kinds of people I hate the most when playing games.”
“One is the teammate who gives away your position, and the other is the teammate who blames you when you give away your position.”
“It’s fine.”
Qi Yu didn’t bother arguing with the self-righteous hypocrite. He raised an eyebrow and said calmly:
“Being able to mess things up is also a kind of skill. Keep it up, you useless thing.”
“Damn it…”
The barrage immediately erupted with another wave of “hahaha.”
Finally, in a harmonious atmosphere, the game match ended.
Although no one managed to win the chicken dinner, Song Yan, thanks to her heaven-sent luck and extraordinary ability to hide in the grass, became the last player to fall.
The situation successfully reversed, and the team that had lost three members first ended up winning.
Just as they were happily high-fiving each other in celebration, Director Zhang’s voice suddenly came through the loudspeaker in the living room:
“I sincerely suggest you all not celebrate too soon.”
“All the tasks we did today were actually just pre-game preparations.”
【Pre-game?】
【Preparations?!】
Hearing the production team say this, the audience immediately grew curious.
What kind of task could possibly require such pre-game preparations?
Everyone present was filled with anticipation, except for Jiang Qiyu, who suddenly felt a chill run down her spine.
Oh no, she had almost forgotten…
“Starting now, we begin the first official outdoor mission of ‘You Know Love’—a real-life battle royale!”
“Tonight, all guests will head to the battle royale venue together for a three-day real-life version of PlayerUnknown’s Battlegrounds.”
“As long as you don’t quit midway or get ‘eliminated’ by an opponent and survive until the end, you’ll receive a mysterious grand prize!”
“……”
After Director Zhang finished speaking, the living room fell into a deathly silence.
It wasn’t surprising that the guests were speechless—even some fans found it hard to accept.
【Seriously, what kind of person comes up with a show format like this?】
【Friends, this is a dating show, right? I thought I’d switched to a military channel by mistake.】
【Show planner, come out here. I promise I won’t hit you!】
Of course, aside from some fans feeling sorry for their idols, most viewers were still somewhat excited.
【Actually, if the production team can ensure safety, I’m quite looking forward to it.】
【Looking forward to it +1. Imagine it: a man and a woman alone, tender moments on the battlefield, sparks flying amid gunfire—it’s going to be amazing!】
【Hahaha, sister in the front row, keep talking. I love hearing this!】
“…That sounds so exciting!”
Fang Xubai was also stunned after hearing Director Zhang’s announcement, but as the youngest guest who hadn’t yet experienced the harsh realities of society, he quickly clapped his hands in approval:
“Teacher Changmao, are we going to play real-life CS?!”
“……”
Jiang Qiyu, dragged along by the arm with a look of despair, shook her head at the excitedly naive (scratch that) foolish young man:
“No, we’re sending you to a transformation program, turning you from the popular idol Fang Xubai into Soldier Assault’s Xu Sanduo.”
“If I’m Xu Sanduo, then what about you?”
“Me?”
She pointed weakly at herself:
“I’m going from a half-assed funeral service provider to a little bug lying flat in the wilderness.”