Song Qingxian lifted her gaze in slight surprise. Fang Cheng was still alive, so deep down, Lu Nanzhan still had some humanity and conscience left, didn’t he?
She curved her lips and gently pressed a kiss against Lu Nanzhan’s cheek. “I know. My Azhan is still kind.”
Lu Nanzhan froze once again. Xianxian had taken the initiative to kiss him.
Kind?
It wasn’t really that he was merciful or kind. It was just that she had told him she would be afraid of him, that she might come to dislike him. He was afraid. Afraid that he would push her even further away.
If she liked the “kind” version of him, then perhaps he should learn to be “kind” in the future.
“I didn’t kill him, but you in the future—”
Before Lu Nanzhan could finish, Song Qingxian interrupted him, “I won’t see him again.”
He looked at her with slight surprise. She had actually guessed what he wanted to say.
She understood him too well. This paranoid, obsessive man had an overwhelming possessiveness over her. He could not stand anyone so much as glancing at her for too long.
Lu Nanzhan gently patted her head. “Be good, Xianxian.”
Song Qingxian glanced around the hospital room. “Azhan, I think I’m fine now. Can I be discharged?”
His expression darkened immediately. “You’re not fine. The baby almost didn’t make it.”
When she had fainted, she had bled quite a lot. Lu Nanzhan had nearly lost his mind from fear. The doctor said it was due to extreme shock and that there had been signs of a threatened miscarriage. The baby had been saved, but she absolutely needed to take care of her body moving forward.
Song Qingxian gently placed a hand over her lower abdomen. Thankfully, the child was fine. Otherwise, Lu Nanzhan would have gone mad again.
She lowered her voice. “Me and the baby were both scared earlier. We both want a gentle father.”
Lu Nanzhan’s eyes lowered slightly. Gentle. What did it even mean to be gentle?
“Can I learn it?” he asked seriously.
Song Qingxian blinked. “Learn what?”
“Learn gentleness,” Lu Nanzhan said in a calm, earnest tone.
She couldn’t help but laugh. It was really hard to connect Lu Nanzhan with the word “gentle.”
“Some things can’t really be learned.”
A trace of disappointment flashed in his eyes. “So Xianxian thinks I can’t become someone you like?”
Song Qingxian suddenly felt a little heartache for him. This man looked so desperate, so quietly obsessive.
“You don’t have to become someone I like,” she said softly.
“But if I don’t become the kind of person you like… how would you ever like me?” His voice was very low.
“I didn’t mean that…”
Lu Nanzhan took her hand and brought it to his lips, kissing it with reverence. “Xianxian, as long as you don’t leave me, I will learn anything you like. So don’t leave me, alright?”
His voice was low and dangerously intoxicating. Those dark eyes of his looked like a black hole in the universe, pulling her in with no way to escape.
Almost as if under a spell, Song Qingxian met his gaze and answered softly, “Alright.”
Later in the evening, servants from the Lu Family sent dinner to the hospital.
A row of dishes was placed before her: beef, pork liver, goose liver, black chicken, and several nourishing soups.
The rich aroma filled the room, but Song Qingxian only felt a wave of nausea rising. She gagged softly.
Lu Nanzhan immediately poured her a glass of water and gently patted her back.
“I can skip eating this, I don’t have an appetite,” she said weakly.
“No,” he replied without room for negotiation. “Your body is injured. You need to replenish blood.”
Song Qingxian looked like she was about to cry. “I really can’t eat…”
Lu Nanzhan picked up a chopstick and brought a piece of meat to her lips. “Xianxian, be good.”
His tone was gentle, but it carried undeniable authority.
She reluctantly took a couple of bites, but the heaviness made her stomach churn even more. She was pregnant and only wanted something light.
His brows furrowed slightly. “Eating so little isn’t acceptable. Xianxian, you’re too thin. You need more.”
“It really makes me feel sick,” she murmured. “Why aren’t you eating? You’re only making me eat.”
“Alright, I’ll eat with you.” He coaxed patiently. “I’ll eat two pieces, and you eat one, okay?”
He then ate two pieces himself.
Only then did Song Qingxian continue eating obediently, unable to argue further.
After the meal, Lu Nanzhan somehow produced a packet of sour plums and handed it to her.
Her eyes lit up instantly. The sour taste was exactly what she needed.
She smiled at him, her lips curving softly. “Azhan, thank you. You’re so good.”
Lu Nanzhan stared at her smile for a long time, completely dazed. Xianxian looked especially beautiful when she smiled. She had never smiled at him like this before.
“Xianxian…” he murmured her name, his voice low and entranced.
With her cheeks stuffed full of sour plums, Song Qingxian looked a little round and adorable. “Hmm? What is it?”
“Xianxian, you’re not… deliberately deceiving me again, are you?” His dark eyes fixed on her intently.
To him, this moment felt unreal, like a dream he might wake up from at any second.
Song Qingxian didn’t understand his logic at all. Just saying thank you counted as deception?
“Deceive you about what?” she asked.
Lu Nanzhan gently traced her brows and eyes, her soft lips, his gaze filled with deep affection and obsession. “Xianxian… why are you suddenly being so good to me?”
She froze slightly.
To him, this already counted as “good”?
Then just how low were his expectations?
“Azhan,” she said seriously, “I will be even better to you in the future. A thousand times better. Ten thousand times better than now.”
Lu Nanzhan suddenly let out a soft laugh. Genuine, unguarded joy spread across his face, even softening the corners of his eyes.
He pulled her into his arms.
“Xianxian, I suddenly look forward to our future so much,” he said softly. “We’ll have a child. A family of three. We’ll live happily together forever, right?”
At that moment, Song Qingxian noticed the number above Lu Nanzhan’s head had risen to 60.
Did that mean his desire to live, his attachment to this world, had increased?
She suddenly realized something. What Lu Nanzhan wanted… was actually very simple.
It was just a home.
She knew he was an unloved illegitimate son, emotionally closed off and cold. In reality, he was just someone who craved love.
Before she knew it, she spoke.
“Azhan, let me love you from now on, alright?”
Lu Nanzhan’s eyes darkened violently, like a storm had been unleashed. His tall body trembled slightly. His eyes reddened as disbelief filled his voice.
“Xianxian… is that true? Really true?”
He had never dared to imagine that Song Qingxian would one day say she would love him.
So he had resorted to all kinds of methods to force her to stay by his side. Even if he couldn’t have her heart, keeping her body beside him was already enough.
To him, Song Qingxian was the only light in his dark, sunless life.
Looking at him like this, she felt an indescribable emotion.
She gently touched his face and answered with quiet certainty.
“It’s true.”
She would love him. Until she saved him.
And in saving him… she would also be saving herself.