That night, Jiang Minyu did not sleep at all.
On one hand, it was because of the pain; on the other, it was because of the resentment he could not suppress, resentment toward Li Yang’s words and attitude… resentment toward Li Yang suddenly bringing up Ran Fan.
Why did he have to mention Ran Fan?
Whether intentional or not, Jiang Minyu had not thought of that person for a very long time.
During this period, his life had been like a race car tearing through winding mountain roads, every second filled with tension and adrenaline. Compared to that relentless rush, Ran Fan had naturally faded from his world like mist over rippling water, dispersing without a trace.
He did not want to think of Ran Fan.
Anything related to Ran Fan made Jiang Minyu instinctively want to avoid it.
Partly because he was cold and partly because he was not yet so cold as to have lost all humanity.
This was something that made Jiang Minyu feel guilty yet human nature was just that despicable: great kindness could turn into great resentment; owing too much became a crushing debt. The heavier the debt of gratitude, the more one wanted to avoid seeing the creditor again.
Perhaps the entire world was set against him, unpleasant things came one after another, without pause.
It was not enough that Jiang Minyu had been in a car accident. He did not want Ran Fan to appear in his thoughts yet anything connected to Ran Fan insisted on forcing its way into his sight.
On the second day, after perfunctorily sending away the many colleagues and friends who came to visit him, Jiang Minyu idly scrolled through his phone. Without warning, he saw news that was inextricably linked to Ran Fan.
His social circle was no longer what it used to be. It was no longer a jumble of random people but instead filled almost entirely with the wealthy and powerful.
Amid the glittering displays of prosperous lives belonging to celebrities and tycoons, one update from a middle aged man stood out starkly. It was from Ran Fan’s father, who should have been far away in their hometown town, posting a location tag at a landmark in S City, accompanied by a line of words that felt oddly cryptic:
“Children and grandchildren have their own blessings.”
Jiang Minyu had blocked and deleted Ran Fan long ago. As for Ran Fan’s father, who had long remained quietly on his contact list, Jiang Minyu had almost forgotten that the man was still there.
Staring at that post, Jiang Minyu fell silent.
Had he come to S City because of Ran Fan?
If one calculated the time since Jiang Minyu and Ran Fan broke up, his arrival was actually not that early.
A faint throbbing pain spread at Jiang Minyu’s temples and memories surfaced against his will.
In the early years, Ran Fan’s father had been very kind to him. Toward the unfamiliar child who often came by to ask for food, he showed pity and care. When he had some spare money, he would buy snacks and fruit for both Ran Fan and Jiang Minyu.
Later, when they were studying, he even helped Jiang Minyu look for learning materials. When he heard that Jiang Minyu wanted to study art and performance, he went around asking people for information on his behalf.
He had been a simple, kind hearted neighbor and elder, until one night, when he caught Jiang Minyu and Ran Fan kissing in the stairwell and his expression changed completely.
“Mad! Absolutely mad! What are you two doing?!”
For Ran Fan’s father, given his age and life experience, this was undoubtedly something he could not accept. He pointed at Ran Fan’s nose and shouted furiously, “You were doing just fine, you even got into university and now you refuse to behave properly! I knew it, sooner or later you’d be led astray by him!”
“Have you seen what his mother is like? If he wants to play with you, it’s just a matter of convenience! And you, what are you going to do with your future?!”
Those words were not directed at Jiang Minyu yet every single sentence pierced him deeply.
Just as the blood rushed to Jiang Minyu’s head, Ran Fan stepped forward, blocking all of his father’s voice and gaze.
“Dad, I’m serious. Wenyu is serious too.”
After that, Jiang Minyu never went to Ran Fan’s home again.
Later on, Jiang Minyu chose to come to S City to study. Ran Fan, faced with the choice between their hometown and S City, chose to follow him. Jiang Minyu knew that father and son still contacted each other occasionally but it was no longer the same dependence and closeness they had shared in their youth.
Jiang Minyu closed his phone and suddenly found that he did not want to look at anything anymore.
He told himself: don’t think about it.
He stayed in the hospital for a full week and was discharged as scheduled.
On the day of his discharge, Li Yang came as promised to see him off, watching as he got into the nanny van.
The manager observed Jiang Minyu’s expression, then glanced at Li Yang’s face drifting nearby, hesitating several times as if wanting to speak but stopping himself each time.
Jiang Minyu noticed it all and pretended not to see anything.
A week was more than enough time for news about Li Yang having a child to spread, especially since Li Yang had made it abundantly clear that he wanted everyone to know. From the moment the news began to stir, people had not stopped probing Jiang Minyu with insinuations and roundabout questions. Some even asked him outright what he planned to do.
Jiang Minyu’s replies were all the same.
“Get lost. What the hell does it have to do with you?”
He had never once thought about inheriting the Li family business. The Li family’s empire was like a massive ocean liner, outsiders saw nothing but a ship full of gold and jewels but the one in the cockpit knew that steering it required enormous strength. One wrong turn and the entire vessel, along with everyone on board, would sink together.
The Li family had never raised him. On what grounds should he exhaust himself like an ox or a horse for their business?
He resented Li Yang and he hated that old man even more.
If all he wanted was the Li family’s wealth and fame, regardless of whether floods drowned everything else, so what?
Even without shouldering the banner of inheritance, what the Li family provided him with was already enough to let his hand brush the sky itself. When they first acknowledged him and brought him back, the condition they offered was a personal trust worth several billion.
He did not care about the position of heir but it seemed that some people cared very much.
Before long, a number of his drinking and feasting friends drifted away from his side. Jiang Minyu had a cast on his leg and he had already known how to clear them out anyway. Fewer people was better. He decisively moved into the luxury garden villa registered under his own name and shut himself inside, writing songs at home.
Jiang Minyu’s original reason for entering the entertainment industry, aside from making money, had always been music.
He genuinely loved writing songs and singing. After fooling around for a few months, picking it back up now felt just right yet, strangely enough, when he used to be busy, inspiration came nonstop; now that he finally had time, inspiration refused to come. After much effort, he managed to cobble together a barely passable song and sent it out for others to listen to. The responses came flooding back:
“I think it’s especially good.”
“It’ll definitely blow up!”
“Brother Wenyu, you’ve always been incredibly talented.”
These were all young, good looking peers. Among them was even Kael, who had argued with him not long ago. Stripped of the identity of Li family heir, Jiang Minyu still possessed exceptional looks and charm, enough to draw this group to orbit around him.
But Jiang Minyu was not satisfied with these responses.
What trash had he written? How was this considered good?
He kept writing. After finishing, he sent the songs out again. The feedback from the outside world remained praise. Back and forth, over and over, until he was staring at a desk covered in discarded sheet music, Jiang Minyu himself lost the ability to judge.
Was he actually writing well?
Were his previous songs good?
Did he even have the ability to write songs at all?
Irritability rose within Jiang Minyu.
After calming down, he thought: he had ability. Of course he did.
Because Ran Fan had once told him so, back when he had nothing at all, looking at him with bright, gentle eyes and saying, “Wenyu, you’re amazing. You’ll definitely make something of yourself someday.”
Ran Fan never lied to him. So he must be capable.
Why had he suddenly thought of Ran Fan again?
It could only be blamed on the fact that Ran Fan had accompanied him for too long a portion of his life, stitched together with Jiang Minyu’s own existence. Trying to tear it apart was like pulling at flesh that was still clinging together.
Jiang Minyu decided not to think about him anymore and he put that decision into action.
He played games at home, watched movies and invited people over to chat and keep him company.
There were too many outstanding people around him, all more than willing to accompany him. Jiang Minyu lived like this for a while yet, contrary to expectations, his perception of happiness dulled far sooner than he had imagined and he quickly grew bored.
If his body had been normal, if he could run, jump, go out, skydive, ride horses and stand at the center of roaring crowds of fans, then it would likely have taken a long time for his heart to settle into stillness.
But fate was cruelly precise. A car accident had broken his leg, trapping him in a fixed space where he could go nowhere and so the emptiness inside him gradually revealed itself.
He felt bored.
Even though he was not lacking in company, their companionship was always fleeting. After the passion faded, bodies grew tired, heavy, unwilling to move yet Jiang Minyu still felt light, as if he were floating, unsure of where he was suspended.
He still wanted someone to keep him company but no one could stay with him day and night and once someone truly was willing to give up their own time to revolve around him, he would either find them unsuited to his tastes and clash with them constantly, or feel that what they gave him was simply not enough.
After a period of time, Jiang Minyu stopped staying with anyone at all.
He counted the days alone, letting them pass one by one.
Once his leg healed, it would be fine. He would eventually get through this stretch.
That was what Jiang Minyu told himself.
Two months later, he returned to the hospital to have the cast removed.
After another half month of rehabilitation and rest, he was finally able to begin working again. On that day, one of the reminders in his phone surfaced.
Winter had arrived.
It was time for the death anniversary of his mother, the woman surnamed Jiang.
Jiang Minyu’s mother had died in the year he entered university. After her death, her remains were kept at the funeral home in their hometown and Jiang Minyu had never purchased a burial plot for her.
This year was different. After some thought, Jiang Minyu cleared his schedule, made no public appearances and traveled alone in a low key manner back to his hometown.
In the storage room of the funeral home, he saw the woman’s photograph and memories of the day she died surfaced in his mind.
Even now, he still wished she had died in a car accident or drowned after falling into a river, anything but such an undignified death.
She had lived her entire life selfishly and indulgently and even in death she was selfish, leaving behind nothing but gossip and pointed fingers.
When Jiang Minyu received the news, he had been packing his luggage to go to S City. After hearing it, he said to Ran Fan, “I guess I don’t have to worry anymore about her finding me at university to ask for money.”
Ran Fan rushed over and hugged him tightly, pressing Jiang Minyu’s head firmly against his chest. Jiang Minyu heard Ran Fan’s heartbeat and suddenly collapsed, trembling uncontrollably. Ran Fan patted his back gently, silently shedding tears.
There was no formal funeral. They simply found someone to guide them through the procedures. From start to finish, only Ran Fan stayed by his side.
After the cremation, there was still the process of collecting the remains and it was Ran Fan who accompanied him, piece by piece.
That night, they stood outside the remote funeral home until midnight, beneath a sky full of stars. Jiang Minyu said to Ran Fan, “Do you know? I actually hated her to death. I wished every day that she would die.”
“From the time I was little, the thing I hated most was being asked who my mother was and being told that I looked like her.”
Ran Fan held his hand and said, “You’re not alike.”
Jiang Minyu fell silent. Then, at a moment that came far too late, he turned his back and began to cry.
Of course he was nothing like his mother.
His mother had spent her life boasting about how skilled she was at manipulating people, about how many people loved her yet in reality, everyone around her came and went in shallow performances. Those who saw her true face, none of them loved her.
But he was different. He had Ran Fan. No matter what, Ran Fan would always love him.
“You have to stay with me for a lifetime,” Jiang Minyu asked Ran Fan for a promise. “We can never be separated, not for our whole lives.”
Ran Fan looked at him through tears and replied, “Okay.”
At that time, Jiang Minyu was sincere. It was just that the weight of that promise had grown lighter at some point he could no longer pinpoint.
And now, at this very moment, that weight was slowly resurfacing, pressing down on Jiang Minyu’s heart.
What was Ran Fan doing now?
They had been broken up for nearly seven months already. Was Ran Fan doing well?
Jiang Minyu thought: he did not regret it. He was simply curious.
People had to move forward. His choice had not been wrong. He just wanted to know and once he knew, he would stop dwelling on it.
The next morning, Jiang Minyu returned to S City.
Still alone, he quietly went to the residential complex where he and Ran Fan had once lived together.
He had no intention of disturbing Ran Fan. He only wanted to see him from afar, just once. Unexpectedly, he ran into a young man at the entrance of the building, who invited him to go in together.
“Which unit are you from? What floor do you live on?”
“I just bought a place here recently. Renovation’s finally finished. We’ll be neighbors from now on.”
“You’ve got a great build, are you a model? Oh right, I’m on the 16th floor.”
Jiang Minyu was wearing a mask. Even so, his silhouette was still striking. He had no desire to chat with a stranger but upon hearing that, he suddenly froze.
“What did you say?” he asked.
The young man was startled. “What’s wrong?”
After a few more exchanges, Jiang Minyu’s head began to spin. He didn’t even know how he left.
He had never imagined it, had not even allowed himself the slightest possibility to think it, that Ran Fan would sell the apartment.
The home they had chosen together, renovated together and lived in for so long.
In truth, it made sense. They had broken up. Ran Fan had been hurt. It was unbearable to stay in a place soaked with sorrow.
Yet Jiang Minyu’s emotions would not settle. He found it hard to digest, panic nearly surging up, cold sweat breaking out over and over again.
On the street, he took out his phone and removed Ran Fan from his blacklist. A flurry of notifications rang out as messages he had previously blocked poured in.
He saw Ran Fan’s messages, sent intermittently, stopping several months back. Jiang Minyu’s fingers trembled slightly. Silently, he told himself it was fine, that it didn’t matter.
He should go home first. Everything could be dealt with afterward but that very afternoon, his actions carried him straight to the pet hospital.
The staff there replied in surprise, “You’re looking for Ran Fan? Doctor Ran resigned months ago.”
Then they looked at him closely, astonished. “Y.. you’re Jiang Minyu, right?”
“Oh my god… Doctor Ran really hid this well, Mr. Jiang. Can I even ask this? What’s your relationship with Doctor Ran? Are you distant relatives or something?”
Jiang Minyu couldn’t answer that question, because at that very moment, he was asking himself the same thing.
He had thought it would be hard to answer yet the answer in his heart came with startling speed.
Jiang Minyu, what exactly was Ran Fan to you?
Ran Fan had been his older brother, his friend, his partner.
Ran Fan was, in fact, everything he had ever rooted into this human world of emotion.
What on earth was he doing?
✦ ✧ ✦
Fleurveil
[Translator]
☕ A LITTLE SOMETHING FOR THE TRANSLATOR
You made it to the end. The translator would like a tiny coffee. ☕
☕ BUY THEM A COFFEE →
✧ (づ｡•ㅅ•｡)づ ☕ ✧
✦ thank you for reading ✦
← PreviousNext →
ChaptersChapter 1 · Let’s break upChapter 2 · A hand landed on Ran Fan’s backChapter 3 · Jiang Wenyu’s biological fatherChapter 4 · Li Yang kissed him againChapter 5 · Could you come to the hospital?Chapter 6 · I hope you can give birthChapter 7 · Are you bothered by the fact that I am Jiang Wenyu’s biological father?Chapter 8 · Don’t you think I’m ordinary?Chapter 9 · Don’t consider it me going back on my wordChapter 10 · You are a truly remarkable personChapter 11 · Would you say you’re cold-hearted towards Ran Fan?Chapter 12 · Dr. Ran resigned several months ago.Chapter 13 · Can we meet up?Chapter 14 · You also know the child’s fatherChapter 15 · You are the most important to meChapter 16 · Extra 1Chapter 17 · Extra 2Chapter 18 · Extra 3