Doudou covered his little bottom. “Doudou doesn’t want to! It’s Daddy’s fault.”
Bai Shu shook his head, feeling that his little brother was still too naive. Their dad only had eyes for mom; the two of them didn’t really matter in comparison. Once dad’s secret stash was discovered by Doudou this time, mom was bound to be furious.
Right now, dad was probably racking his brains over how to punish Doudou.
Doudou kicked his little legs, gesturing for his big brother to put him down, and beckoned to Bai Shu with his little hand. “Big Brother”
Hearing that address made Bai Shu’s brow twitch. Doudou was actively calling him big brother?
The little fellow was definitely plotting something sneaky.
“Just say it right there.” Bai Shu didn’t want to bend over; that way, when dad came to settle scores later, he could easily wash his hands of it and distance himself.
Doudou rushed over and tightly hugged his big brother’s leg. “Big Brother, please don’t tell Daddy, okay We haven’t touched this money in so long Daddy definitely forgot about it”
The little fellow rubbed his soft little face against Shushu’s leg, his voice sweet and milky there’s no describing how adorable he was.
However, Bai Shu merely let out a cold huff, reached out to poke his little brother’s small shoulder, and pushed him a bit further away.
Doudou retreated weakly, stumbling backward as if he were the vulnerable party here.
Bai Shu wasn’t falling for his little brother’s act at all.
He looked with satisfaction at the distance between them and took another step back. “Here’s the thing, Doudou. Whether I say anything or not doesn’t even matter anymore did you happen to forget something?”
Just at that moment, the security camera began to pan, making a slight mechanical whirring sound in the quiet room.
Doudou opened his eyes wide and turned around, locking eyes with the camera lens. He immediately clutched his chest and collapsed dramatically onto the pile of cash. “Aiya, Doudou was just sleeping the whole time, I have no idea what happened. Doudou must be sleepwalking~”
The little fellow squeezed his eyes shut and pretended to be asleep.
His movements were exceptionally smooth, devoid of any genuine emotion and entirely dependent on pure technique.
However, the slight flutter of his long, trembling eyelashes betrayed that his state of mind wasn’t quite as calm as he pretended.
The little voice inside Doudou’s head was weeping in despair. Wuwuwu, why is there a camera installed in here too?!
Didn’t Daddy say this was the most top-secret place in the house?
Every time he wanted to come in and play with Daddy, Daddy would always say that.
Children aren’t allowed to enter the study.
Thus, the study had become the most mysterious place in Doudou’s heart. But whenever Daddy wasn’t around, he snuck in every single day.
Otherwise, he never would have discovered so much of Daddy’s private stash.
Bai Shu shook his head helplessly. “Hurry up and get up, you’re filthy.”
The bills underneath had been dug out from who knows which dusty corner.
Hehehe, let auntie give you a kiss, and auntie will pretend she didn’t see anything except Doudou sleeping obediently in his little bed. Kiss auntie, auntie definitely won’t tell a soul. Cough cough, auntie upstairs, didn’t you realize you’re a generation apart from Bai Shu now? Oh well, in that case, I won’t be an auntie anymore. Let big sister give you a kiss Adorable Doudou and Shushu, Dad surely won’t have the heart to lay a hand on them. Hahaha, but Doudou is seriously too capable. I feel like he’s explored every single inch of that study, knowing it way better than Dad himself. Indeed, some of those spots are places you’d never even think of. Doudou is way too amazing. Okay, I’ve successfully dug out my partner’s secret stash using Doudou’s method. Thanks, Doudou! Holy cow! Going to put this into practice right now.
With a series of soft wuwu whimpers, Doudou rubbed his eyes and scrambled back up. He half-crawled, half-stumbled over to hug Shushu’s calf again, plopping his bottom right onto his slipper.
“Save Doudou, please Shushu”
Daddy’s spankings hurt so much.
Earlier when he had intentionally reached out to touch the boiling kettle, Daddy had pinned him down and walloped his little bottom.
Doudou had cried for a very long time.
The aggrieved little cub had thrown a tantrum insisting on sleeping with Mommy, and Daddy’s face had looked terrifyingly dark.
Feeling the child’s chubby little bottom, Bai Shu said with a trace of disgust, “Get up already. You’re a filthy Doudou right now, don’t go getting Big Brother dirty too.”
Hearing that, not only did Doudou refuse to let go, but he deliberately rubbed his dirt-smudged little face against Bai Shu’s thigh.
He had rolled around in every single dusty dead-corner of the study; right now, his hands, face, and clothes were all covered in grime.
Bai Shu wasn’t exaggerating in the slightest when he called Doudou a dirty little cub.
“No-no-no loving Shushu means doing sticky-cuddles with Shushu”
“I don’t need your love right now, hurry up and get off me.” Bai Shu wasn’t a neat freak, but seeing Doudou make himself this filthy still made his temples throb with bulging veins.
What made it worse was that the little rascal was deliberately rubbing himself all over him.
“I won’t get up. You can wash yourself in the bathtub later, and if you slip under and drown, nobody’s going to save you.” Bai Shu threatened him fiercely.
At that, Doudou instantly released his grip on Bai Shu’s calf, looking utterly terrified and frail. “Shushu is going to save Doudou, right? You promised Mommy you would.”
Doudou was a child with an exceptionally strong sense of self-preservation: he was terrified of slipping in the bath and drowning if he couldn’t climb back out, he drank water extremely slowly for fear of choking to death, and he navigated every single step on the stairs with extreme caution…
Watching Doudou’s terrified expression, a wave of regret washed over Bai Shu.
He shouldn’t have brought that up.
Doudou hadn’t forgotten what happened previously.
Bai Shu sighed. “Fine, whatever. Dad definitely knows by now; tonight you can explain it to him yourself. Before that, remember to call Mommy first.”
Anyway, Doudou would surely manage to coax Mommy into a good mood.
Once that happened, the issue with Dad would naturally resolve itself.
“Mhm mhm! Doudou is a good boy~”
“Good boy my foot! Hurry up and go take a bath.” With a darkened face, Bai Shu hoisted the child up by his collar and carried him straight toward the bathroom.
“The money, the money, the money” Doudou cried out anxiously. This was the fruit of all his hard work; it couldn’t just vanish like this.
Ruthlessly, Bai Shu declared, “Confiscated.”
He added, “If you actually messed around and spent this money, a beating is guaranteed.”
Doudou let out a wronged, muffled whimper.
His master plan had suffered an untimely death right in the preparation stage.
Doudou’s heart was utterly shattered.
I’m going to die laughing. Doudou’s hard work all went down the drain, hahaha. Pouring one out for him. We didn’t see anything, can Bai Dad just pretend he’s blind to this?! Doudou is so pitiful. Bai Dad, for the sake of how cute Doudou is, please let him off! He didn’t even get to keep the cash. Hahaha, but the old father’s entire nest egg has been hollowed out completely. Bai Dad: Is there nobody out there willing to speak up for me? Bai Mom: I’ll speak up for you,you’re sleeping in the study tonight. Hahahahahaha, I’m dying!
Scrubbed clean into a soft, fluffy little dumpling, Doudou lay face-up on the bed with a hollow, vacant stare.
Bai Shu…
“Why on earth do you want so much money anyway?”
“Wuwu”
“Speak. Wait a minute, I told you to apologize, I didn’t tell you to use money to apologize.”
This little rascal must have watched way too many television dramas, thinking everything could be solved with cash.
Torn between laughter and exasperation, Bai Shu pinched the bridge of his nose. “Didn’t the production crew say that our backup fund is only two hundred yuan? We spent it all today, and the remaining two hundred was given by your Brother Xiran. But you can’t just take the money he gave you and use it to apologize to him either.”
Bai Shu patiently attempted to reason with his little brother.
After a long pause, Doudou replied, “…It’s Uncle.”
Bai Shu snapped, “Get down there and eat dinner.”
What a waste of his time and breath; from now on, he needed to be much more direct when talking to Doudou.
Stomach rumbling with hunger, Doudou nimbly rolled off the bed. “Alrighty, coming right down.”
With a gloomy face, Bai Shu watched Doudou run past him faster than he could move himself, truly admiring the child’s ability to bend and stretch to fit any situation.
His little younger brother was honestly a mystery.
After eating his fill, Doudou asked, “Can I send a voice message to apologize to Uncle?”
He had no money left, and didn’t want to spend any more anyway.
Bai Shu took a sip of soup. “Then you might as well just face him and apologize in person tomorrow.”
Doudou rubbed his chubby little face in thought. “That works too.”
With that, he puffed out his round belly and waddled upstairs.
Bai Shu called after him, “Walk around a bit before you go to sleep.”
Doudou covered his ears and sprinted away; he didn’t want to walk, walking was way too tiring.
Having eaten and drank his fill, time to check in on Doudou. Truly worthy of being the newly minted ASMR eating companion, he polished off an extra bowl of rice. Hahaha, my kid is the exact same. Watching Doudou eat means I don’t even need anyone to coax them into finishing their food anymore. My baby is only over two months old and doesn’t need anyone to coax them either, hehe, as long as Doudou is the one doing the coaxing~
Once upstairs, Doudou cautiously shut his bedroom door tight.
Then his expression shifted completely. A gloomy, mischievous chuckle bubbled up from his throat: “Hehehehe~”
He bet they didn’t expect that all his earlier antics were completely staged just to fool Shushu~
When he had snuck into the study to forage for his dad’s pocket money, he had held back a trump card.
His original goal had indeed been to get his hands on a massive pile of cash.
However, that definitely didn’t include those ordinary paper bills.
Because in TV dramas, people always used million-dollar checks!
Ta-da-da Doudou fished a heavily crumpled check right out of his pocket.
He had stumbled upon it while digging through his dad’s cabinet drawers. It looked identical to the ones on television!
Except his copy was still blank. He was going to write in a cool million right away.
Viewers tuning into the live stream zoomed in on their screens, realizing that the slightly greenish paper ball in his hand genuinely appeared to be a bank check!
!!! Is that a check Doudou is holding? Looks like it, but right now it’s just a crumpled waste-paper ball. Does this silly little kid not realize checks can’t be folded up like that? Hahaha, when I saw Doudou’s sudden change of expression just now, I thought he was cooking up another massive scheme. Turns out he really did prepare a big one. I’m dying. Will adult Doudou want to cry when he looks back at all this cringe history? How is this cringe history? This is clearly my favorite dinner-time variety show! So funny. Watching silly little Doudou is the best cure for a lack of appetite.
Doudou didn’t have a black marker like the ones in TV dramas, but he had a set of colored crayons.
Selecting a fluorescent green crayon and sitting down at his little desk, the little fellow carefully unfolded the crumpled paper ball.
He let out a soft breath, feeling quite nervous.
He was currently undertaking a monumental operation involving a financial sum of one million!
Finally, making up his mind, he gripped the crayon and scrawled three crooked digits onto the paper:
1, 0, 0
Every single number possessed its own unique, dancing posture, showcasing their extraordinary individuality.
However, after that, Doudou stopped writing. He put down the crayon and scratched his head. “Wait, how do you write the word ‘million’ again?”
He only knew how to write up to one hundred.
The viewers in the live stream spat out their drinks in unison.
Good grief, Doudou, can you please stop trying to make people laugh until they choke!
Bai Yishan nearly spewed his water all over his computer monitor. With a trembling finger pointing at the screen showing the child, he told his wife on the other end of the line, “Honey, we seriously need to send this kid to school.”
He felt deeply apologetic toward the audience; he never imagined Doudou could be foolish in such an adorable way.
Looking at that crumpled check and the earthworm-like scribbles scrawled across it, Qin Yue also lapsed into a rare moment of deep contemplation.
She thought to herself with delicate tact: Doudou might just be a little too clever for his own good.